Darren Davies

c'est la vie

[Quite Interesting @qikipedia]

"You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it." ROBIN WILLIAMS

[Ian Dunt @IanDunt]

A country that shat itself when KFC ran out of chicken is now considering running out of everything else. https://t.co/ebzXV8VBok

[Darren Davies @DarrenDLD]

@EmmEDavies Nuffin new there !!!!

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

More two-word horror stories:

Eye contact
Lunch meeting
Surprise party
Planned engineering
Sing along
Conference call
Signal failure
They’re here
Team building
Low carb
Record highs
Unexpected item
You busy?
Quick word
Friend request
Leg day
Your parcel
Tax return
Happy birthday

[Rob Wilkinson @DoobysTaxiola]

I’m going to invent a device for cars that automatically flings dog shit at the windscreen of others who don’t use the friendly wave of acknowledgement.

[BBC Question Time @bbcquestiontime]

‘Can we get over feeling sorry for Theresa May?’
This audience member criticises the prime minister’s handling of Brexit. #bbcqt

[Richard Osman @richardosman]

I have written a poem.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Ideas for getting more exercise next year:

- Move the biscuits farther away
- Buy a heavier kettle

[Simon Blackwell @simonblackwell]

Merry Christmas fellow passengers to the grave x

[Simon Blackwell @simonblackwell]

Queen To Call For Everyone To Get A Fucking Grip In Christmas Message

[Darren Davies @DarrenDLD]

@EmmEDavies Hello wifey xxxxxx

[Tony Blackburn OBE. @tonyblackburn]

I've been up all night thinking what we should do to solve the Brexit problem and I've come up with a terrific idea. We should have a referendum on should we have another referendum. If this turns out to not be what the politicians want then I see no reason not to have another

[Russell Brand @rustyrockets]

Message of Gratitude - 16 years Clean. THANK YOU. ❤

[Darren Davies @DarrenDLD]

@EmmEDavies Cos of me I guess

[David Baddiel @Baddiel]

I feel I should take the job of Brexit Secretary now. If only so that when I resign, Theresa May can finally be proved right than No Deal is better than a Baddiel.

[Darren Davies @DarrenDLD]

Awesome talent!

[John Lewis & Partners @JohnLewisRetail]

It’s here! This year’s Christmas ad, as launched by our Partners, featuring the wonderful @EltonOfficial 🌟🚀 #EltonJohnLewis 🎹

[James Corden @JKCorden]

This commercial was banned from TV for being too political. I think everyone should see it x

[Darren Davies @DarrenDLD]

@LeeBish22 There's always next year mr Bish