Dave Coombes

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@georgiadepont @PalomaGroup I essentially split my life into two parts. There is BS (before squiggles) and AS (anno squiggilus - in the year of our squiggle).

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@headof5 @fesshole You’ve no idea how close to the truth that is! On moving to Oz we had to present our certificate for our visa and it said “Elvis and Priscilla”. Made a very worried call to the Nevada state registrar only to find out “this happens all the time” and we got a copy of ours for $20

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

Chandelles for forks, presumably.

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@MattMilliss The Grass Roots? Or a personal maxim? Or both??!!

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@adoptapuffin "Alexa, voulez vous aller a la discotheque avec moi ce soir?"
Never leaves you. I can also help Alexa buy tickets at a train station if that would be of any use?

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@keandrews Ah fucksticks ☹️

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@freshtonic Our dog has been doing that for years. And he didn’t cost 3 grand

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@nick_s_drew Brilliant. This one a couple of weeks ago with Harry Enfield as Fergy https://t.co/Oar1DNjdMb

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@dcotterill What? While you were wearing it? That must be quite a tricky shot.

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@delitescere @thattommyhall

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@MattMilliss As Rod Stewart said, The first cut is the deepest,baby. Actually that’s not true. In my case the first cut was just fine. The second cut however…different story. But so glad I’ve got them both done. Thanks for nothing Rod, when I want your advice I’ll ask for it next time.

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@freshtonic Just use the mnemonic "2 Ritalins, 1 Sugar". Easy!

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@pavanraju023 Typo?

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@keandrews 😂that’s the only Nigella recipe I would have half a chance of making. I am usually more ‘trough’ than ‘cauldron’

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@dcotterill Watchmen and The Boys if you haven’t watched them already.

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@keandrews Glad you like it!

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@grassdog And then I end up here and I’m pretty sure Mrs Fugazi is all “cast ne'er a clout till may be out” https://t.co/ZLfyFo5NRk

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@grassdog Let’s face it, google knows best

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@grassdog And then before you know it you’re listening to this https://t.co/UaSpp1Hc1D

[Dave Coombes @davecoombes]

@grassdog Oh! That hit the spot