David Perry

Reporter for LOL News Corp *This profile is satire and is part of the 'Cause It's On TV' world

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

https://t.co/txY1lOYTW9…

Breaking news: Hordes of liberals seem to have been posting videos pissing in bottles and drinking it after President Drumff made an executive order banning citizens from drinking their own piss.

@LOL_NewsCorp's own Jack Xapper with the coverage

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

@CauseItsOnTV @TheFive @greggutfeld https://t.co/HtkNJAMDBa

Id like to point out Xapper was extremely Christphobic of Santa and I would like his anchor job and I don't care who knows it.

He led with the pee thing here for Christ sakes...Santa had just died...

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

David Perry from @LOL_NewsCorp at the White House with President Drumff with an exclusive interview after taking out drug kingpin and venuzelan dictator.

A quote we can give right now "This is way bigger than when we took binbaden out of Guantamo and shot him...much bigger" @CNN

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

Breaking news from the future...The Russians were able to abduct zelnsky last night in an operation with no casualties on their side...even their enemies are calling "Holy shit that's impressive"

David Perry on the scene for @LOL_NewsCorp

@CNN #DrumffAndroid2028

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

That's right the man known as The Santa Clause killer Ted Buttfeld is between a rock and a hard place.

https://t.co/0VRmHjx6e0

Ted Buttfeld @greggutfeld of course being the man who slaughtered Santa clause on live television in @Faux_NewsCorp 's own studio

@cnn @FoxNews

[LOL News Corp @LOL_NewsCorp]

@LOL_NewsCorp can confirm our own @DavidPLOLNews is on the scene and the Marshall's have chased The Santa Clause Killer @greggutfeld Ted Buttfeld into the Chicago dam

Stay tuned folks and stay safe

Happy new year.

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

@mask_bastard Lol Jesus Christ...

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

@mask_bastard @adammocklerr This just in...Party that has been trying to impeach man on lamest reasonings of all time, had smoking gun and chose not to use it.

This is a bold strategy Tom we'll see if it pays off for them...clearly 7D chess on the Democrats part

Back to you in the studio Tom @LOL_NewsCorp

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

@DelusionPosting

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

This just in. awful human who should have had every single one of her children taken away from her at some point of everyone of their lives is upset she doesn't hav grand kids

Lost on this person of course is one of her sons doesn't even want her seeing his dogs let alone kids

[Earth-271 🇬🇧 @Earth_271]

Cause It's On TV - Episode 1 - A Charlie Brown Modern Christmas

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

@sneako How about you and they get out?

[LOL News Corp @LOL_NewsCorp]

@CNN @PeteButtigieg @FoxNews @DavidPLOLNews @CauseItsOnTV @Faux_NewsCorp

[LOL News Corp @LOL_NewsCorp]

Breaking news since the commercial break many who identify as "leftwing" have begun posting videos of them pissing in bottles and drinking it.

Possibly to defy the president's latest address to the American people.

@cnn @FoxNews @Faux_NewsCorp @CauseItsOnTV

[Faux News Corp @Faux_NewsCorp]

Faux News Corp CEO has come out and said that Huck Finnson is fired for his anti-semetic comments.

"He's fired as fuck. I'm not losing my daughter to a car accident protecting his free speech"

@cnn @FoxNews

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

Breaking LOL News Corp CEO Chadwick Talon just said on a hot mic that he "begrudgingly has to start supporting a democrat 2028 win as the Republican pool is just a bunch of Jesus boys or Trojan horses for India to get into the white house decision makings."

@cnn @LOL_News_Media

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

@screentime Who the hell even made it through episode 1?

[David Perry @DavidPLOLNews]

@KenGel0 @DiscussingFilm Then in phase 2 introduce Vandal Savage and the fact he never dies.

Then do the WW2 time travel story