David Ballard

I’ve got big dreams and a small apartment. I’ve got friends in high places and high friends in places. I’m a Renaissance man but I’ve never run a seance, man.

[David Ballard @dballard]

@Zipcar I’m trying to sign up for a membership but I’m waiting for my permanent license in the mail. How can I verify my eligibility in the meantime?

[David Ballard @dballard]

In what world is the disaster in Baltimore a “partial” collapse? That entire bridge is gone! I can only hope that there were no fatalities, but I don’t expect it to be so. How awful.

[David Ballard @dballard]

@andrewrhol What’s your brand? What kind of roles do you go in for? I think it’s always a good idea to get a vertical and a horizontal, but it’s most important to have shots that clearly communicate your type to casting directors.

[David Ballard @dballard]

@Mister_the_Frog Anytime!

[Brian Tyler Cohen @briantylercohen]

My God. Stop what you're doing and watch this.

[David Ballard @dballard]

Hey @tovalafood, can you please add a “rotate food” step/push notification to the recipe creation process? My bacon always gets super-crispy on one end and stays very soft on the other. Pretty please? And have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

[David Ballard @dballard]

Am I a mad genius, or just mad? I present to you: scrambled-egg ham wraps with red wine-mushroom gravy!

[David Ballard @dballard]

Yo, @nytimes, care to correct this infographic where the “yes” and the “no” votes are labeled opposite to the reality? You have the correct information on the linked article, but come on. For the price of my subscription, I’d expect at least some basic editing standards.

[David Ballard @dballard]

I love every bit of this. Yes, there are important layers of culture from many different places and peoples in the bedrock of America, but this is 💯. Hip hop has had a massive and lasting impact on the music and art and fashion of this nation and deserves to be celebrated

[Vice President Kamala Harris Archived @VP46Archive]

Let's be clear: Hip hop culture is America's culture.

It was a joy to celebrate 50 years of hip hop with some of the greats.

[David Ballard @dballard]

I’m always confused how they decide what difficulty level each quartet is. I frequently guess the “harder” ones first because I can suss out the impostors faster

[mutnchops @mutnchops_]

Okay so Sunday is a LOT harder 😅

Connections
Puzzle #91
🟦🟦🟦🟦
🟨🟨🟨🟨
🟪🟪🟪🟪
🟩🟩🟩🟩

[David Ballard @dballard]

If anybody knows who this woman is, PLEASE let the relevant authorities know! An attack on any of us is an attack on all of us! Stay safe out there, y’all!

[Zach Attack @zachattack_23]

NYC if you see this woman she gay bashed Hunter (@hunty.nyc) today on the train. Stay vigilant. @NYPDTips

[David Ballard @dballard]

@Mister_the_Frog Boy you know I’m always happy to click “show me” on those buttons!

[David Ballard @dballard]

@ElShellTrashbag Awww Princeton baby! I miss you! So glad to hear he’s healthy and going strong ❤️❤️❤️

[David Ballard @dballard]

@Telegraph The entire idea of being “well-bred” like people are horses or dogs (as much as I love them!) is racist, classist, homophobic, xenophobic, misogynist, colonialist, ableist, and every other social ill under the sun. It certainly isn’t acceptable if you actually respect people.

[David Ballard @dballard]

Yo @greyhound, can anyone explain why my bus from Philly to NYC, which was already half an hour late leaving, is apparently going to be an HOUR late arriving? There is no traffic. Why is it taking so long? And why should I ever use you again? This is unacceptable.

[David Ballard @dballard]

Hey @MTA, It's insane to me that with a neighborhood the size of Astoria, with multiple lines, someone MADE A PLAN that means there are zero trains running there overnight ALL WEEKEND. ZERO TRAINS. No N trains, no E trains, no M trains. Anyone care to explain?

[David Ballard @dballard]

@JeremiahLee I didn’t even know your legal last name *wasn’t* Lee; we met in college as well, so that’s about 20 years of knowing you only as Jeremiah Lee

[David Ballard @dballard]

@JohnMCoons Baby goat, obviously. Or is that the kid menu?

[David Ballard @dballard]

@imdanabowling Neither. I’d prefer to speed-read through a transliteration while viewing the occasional still image that illustrates a relevant point. If I have to watch a video I will skip it.

[David Ballard @dballard]

@mrzaddybry And I got accused of “trying to break the glass” and was not only kicked out, but banned. We shouldn’t have to put up with straight people running our spaces because they don’t always have our interests at heart, they just want our money. 2/2

[David Ballard @dballard]

@mrzaddybry I was once kicked out of a “gay bar” for reporting another (older male) patron sexually assaulting a younger male patron (unwanted groping), and the owner said he didn’t believe me “because that guy is straight”, and I put my glass down a little hard on the bar in frustration 1/2