Jake Wagner

at 4:35 in the morning, everything is clear.

[Mr11inchs🍆 8/7 - 8/9 CHICAGO Market Days😈 @AFl813]

Most of these Men that call themselves Chasers aren’t REAL CHASER’s

Glad to see the Bear/Chub community waking up and smelling the coffee. You are not a hole or just a Fat Booty to fuck. You are an amazing and beautiful human being 🙌🏾🙌🏾

[Thrilla the Gorilla @ThrillaRilla369]

Why on earth am I tipping 20% for pick-up orders? I drove there, picked up my food, and had zero table service! Yet I'm guilted into leaving a tip because the payment screen shames me into it. Isn't this setup just absolutely ridiculous?

[CasualNerd @CasualNerd11]

@mikitaisbased They only one not at fault is the pedestrian.

The cyclist should have stopped for the pedestrian.

The van should have stopped for the pedestrian.

The cyclist swerved into the pedestrian.

[Mikita 👨‍💻 @mikitaposts]

@FischerSauma Cyclist should’ve stopped for the pedestrian in the crosswalk. The truck also should’ve stopped.

[Andrea More @amore_orless]

Andrew schulz looks like a mix between a Jewish guy from the 40s and the nazi who killed him

[alex @RUGGEDC0UNTRY]

Tracy Chapman fast car came on and my friend said “this song is actually terrible” when I tell you I nearly slapped her across her stupid face

[StarPlatinum @StarPlatinum_]

He’s the CEO of Astronomer.

She’s Head of HR.

They were seen acting like a couple at a Coldplay concert in front of 65,000 people.

The scandal of Andy Byron and Kristin Cabot🧵

(1/9)

[chris 🫂 @fuqingaverage]

you gonna believe me or that lying ass coldplay jumbotron?

[shivi @heyitsshivi_]

the embarrassed girlie next to them turning out to be their colleague who the head of HR promoted just a week ago…absolute cinema 🙂‍↕️🤌🏼

[Colb @___Colb___]

35 MILLION views in EIGHT hours wallahi he’s finished.

[adre⸆⸉ @itstaytaylors]

miss americana and the heartbreak prince mentioned

[The Notorious J.O.V. @whotfisjovana]

lock her up immediately

[Garrett Scott 🕳 @thegarrettscott]

Just found out that this is their Head of Internal Affairs.

[Dr Kolisa Yola Sinyanya (PhD) 🌍📚🇿🇦 @Kolie_Yola]

This is finishing me! 😂😂😂😂😂

[maybe: k*rk @a_dose_of_wx]

@JasonFox29 Nothing unites the country like making fun of rich people ruining their lives

[Jason Martinez @JasonFox29]

Phillies debut the “Coldplay Kiss Cam”.

Wait for it…

[Cian ☘️🇾🇪 @Cian_McGivern]

That Coldplay moment has got to be one of those all time universal internet memes. Even my gran has seen it and the most recent form of social media she’s had is Skype

[Tiffany Fong @TiffanyFong]

coldplay has provided me more entertainment in the past 24 hours than they have in their entire musical career.

[Jonathan Bowen @BostonByBirth]

You're not going to believe this shit!

When I was a teenager living in Hanover, Massachusetts, I got into a couple of fights with a kid a bit younger than me but slightly bigger, named Andy Byron. He thought he was tough, so I had to put him in his place. I beat him up once or twice, but later, he and another buddy from Laurie Lane—I was the fuckin' new guy—jumped me, and I lost that fight.

Turns out, he's the same guy who was caught cheating on his wife at the Coldplay concert!

The guy clearly hasn't learned his lesson.

When I knew him, I thought he'd be a competitor, he's now the CEO of Astronomy, but I also knew he'd be a complete sociopath, and it turns out I was right.