Secret Diary Of A Dinner Lady

Secret Diary of a Dinner Lady

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Sleeping:

1. Worry all night about a next-day task
2. Wake up and start work at 8am
3. 8.04am - task completed

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

“Stop showing off in front of your friends”, said the mum, to the child she just scarred for life

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Yeah quite warm

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

There's going to be a lot of legs outside the duvet tonight

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

How to stay in if you can and it’s recommended that you do

-Don’t go out
-Resist urge to climb Snowdon
-Decline invites for group hugs in parks
-Don’t mistake virus for human enemy soldier from the past who needs vanquishing
-Stay on interior side of front door
-Throw away shoes

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Things to do indoors:

-Billion piece jigsaw
-Master every type of bread
-Memorise dictionary
-Learn to moonwalk
-Write letters
-Twist & shout
-Empty that box you never empty each time you move
-Make jelly
-Pickle stuff
-Learn harmonica
-Message loved ones
-Donate if you can

[Secret Diary Of A Dinner Lady @diary_lady]

Post assembly on coronavirus and hand washing:
Kids playing coronavirus tag on the playground.
#SecretDinnerLady

[Secret Diary Of A Dinner Lady @diary_lady]

Own clothes for #SportRelief2020 today, it's also #Friday, kids are going to be on a whole other level of hyper today!
#FridayThe13th #SecretDinnerLady

[Secret Diary Of A Dinner Lady @diary_lady]

Two-word happy stories:

Home time
No rain
INSET day
Bell's gone
Lunchtime's finished!

#SecretDinnerLady #microfiction

[Secret Diary Of A Dinner Lady @diary_lady]

Two-word horror stories:

Indoor lunchtime
Short staffed
Own clothes
It's Monday
Sick bucket

#SecretDinnerLady #microfiction

[Secret Diary Of A Dinner Lady @diary_lady]

Me: Put your coat on before you come onto the playground.
Child:
#SecretDinnerLady #TuesdayThoughts

[Secret Diary Of A Dinner Lady @diary_lady]

Child: I really like your shoes, miss.
Me: Thank you, that's very kind.
Child, running back to group of giggling friends: Your turn to do a dare.
Me: 🙄
#SecretDinnerLady #TuesdayThoughts

[Secret Diary Of A Dinner Lady @diary_lady]

Dinner ladies when it's an indoor lunchtime at school...
#TuesdayThoughts #SecretDinnerLady