baleful trix

did you leave your oven on?

[justina @justtjustinaa]

dipping the bug is so funny

[sleepy cowboy @HughGriffin2]

If I was bald you could expect me to turn up to the function wearing some bullshit like this

[blissful rage eggcelent @Astro_Eggcelent]

The most enlightening thing to learn about bugs is that they can't molt without losing their wings permanently

So, most bugs spend 99% of their life and ecological impact as nymphs or larvae, and the winged forms we know them for are actually their "suicidal sex robot" phase

[baleful trix @dollargenderole]

@sidmeowsby Hi, cat expert here! Blepping isn’t “cute” or “heartwarming”. Cats only do this when they are being EXTREMELY silly

[baleful trix @dollargenderole]

@ThreeHatsInARow Might actually be the best IPA in the world

[aIenka @ankyhaidy]

by age 22 you should have set someone's downfall in motion. by age 25 your own downfall should be set in motion

[norberg & co @franzkatka]

they’ve experienced The Horrors together

[saliva plath @cryptofeminism]

Guys that work at weed dispensaries are like “No bro I swear it’s not gonna feel like you’ve been wrapped with bandages and locked in a sarcophagus for 2 thousand years” meanwhile the strain is named The Mummy’s Curse Comes True

[baleful trix @dollargenderole]

@ThreeHatsInARow @freyjatheorange @SpookeySkeleman Are y’all tapped into Fatheads Headhunter

[baleful trix @dollargenderole]

@polypup12387074 @ChefBoyRTZ @_fat_ugly_rat_ “small liberal arts college nestled in the Appalachian mountains” is like 30% of PA’s economy

[the heart @Fredward3948576]

Oh don't you worry, I will be dealt with. My day is coming

[nico 🐻⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚ @robertkittymeow]

This is currently my favorite thing on marketplace, a lady selling her stuff and her cat interrupting each picture

[geek bar miami mint @yourhotstonergf]

it is way too hot to be wearing a condom

[Truth is Scarier @TruthScarier]

Here's a rather bizarre story: the crying carp

[みなづち @minaduchi]

この国には、まだ同性婚がない。
ゲイの僕らは、30年連れ添った。

毎晩、彼が先に風呂へ入る。
その間に、僕がお茶を淹れる。
棚にはいつも、湯呑みが二つ。

最近、彼の手のシミが、少し増えた。

夜の薬を並べるのも、僕の役目だ。
なのに、たった一枚の紙の上で、
二人は今も、赤の他人のまま。

それでも、湯呑みは今夜も二つ。
明日も、僕がそっと並べる。

法律はまだ、僕らを家族と呼ばない。
でも、この二つの湯呑みは、もう家族だ。

[ирис @saltwatermp3]

Bicycles are wondrously gentle and agile animals that can lift ten times their body weight and grieve their dead, but can be skittish when approached by those with impure hearts

[baleful trix @dollargenderole]

@SweetCornSeason @redrummarts I can’t even fault it for that, tbh. Every single long sitcom develops Last Season Syndrome

[baleful trix @dollargenderole]

@EBMoid All subs have to face Berlin during scenes?