doug

[Nikolaj🇺🇦🇵🇸 @nikicaga]

White people be like "I got kicked out of a long Covid WhatsApp support group for being Israeli"

[turbomander @turbomander]

when i found out my 2008 ford ranger was one of them transformers first thing i did was put a towel over the hood and drove that sumbitch through the car wash. he started hollerin' about some allsparks and i said no sir, i ain't interested in no alternative fuel i'm a diesel man

[Becks @BecksWelker]

MLK Jr: I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood

Rovell: how much for the table

[Blake Griffin @blakegriffin23]

Accidentally hit a squirrel yesterday in my car. Feel so guilty I could barely sleep. Casey Anthony is a monster.

[Buford “Hoss” Lee, CFP 🇹🇹 @BufordLee146788]

Lane Kiffin: Ole Miss is racist and I left because of Colonel Reb

Steve Sarkisian: Ole Miss offers basket weaving and they’re stupid

Brian Kelly: Don’t worry it’s not that windy, now get up on the scissor lift and film practice

[matt @mattybtweets69]

There’s a disease going so viral that you can catch it just by looking at someone with it. It’s called, a smile :)

[Van Lathan Jr @VanLathan]

They want LeBron

[doug @douglerh]

@ZestyPretzel @Nindrone The self report is crazy. Nin is not interested in gaming with you

[kchoudhu @kchoudhu]

Notice to Airbnb hosts: if shower pressure is inadequate I will mine Bitcoin in your property.

[bart @soxbart]

The same way we respect Skenes for almost joining the military, we have to respect Judge for almost making contact tonight

[doug @douglerh]

@SwiiFFtAyala @NFL_DovKleiman Just noticed you said Tony romo sorry for reaching out hope you get the help you need buster

[doug @douglerh]

@SwiiFFtAyala @NFL_DovKleiman A real “farmer” has Josh #1 on this list no matter what. Easier to stick to onions than ever speak on my boy again bud

[Aaron @aaroncabrera_]

They said Maxx Crosby blew Black N Mild smoke in Eric Decosta’s face

[Karen McGee @karenmotherof2]

If you send your son a very wise and applicable dad-ism about life and he responds with “Bucknell up on Navy 52-44”… I hate to break it to you, that is not your son. That’s Jon Rothstein

[Saul Staniforth @SaulStaniforth]

Pete Hegseth on Monday: "If you kill Americans.. anywhere on earth we will hunt you down without apology & without hesitation and we will kill you"

Guardian yesterday: "Senators demand investigation after ninth American killed by Israeli settlers or soldiers in West Bank"

[Pranav Sriraman @PranavSriraman]

Brandon Beane is not only one of the worst executives in sports but one of the scariest. Unlike other bad GMs he has complete autonomy over everything he basically run the organization with no checks and balances.

[Otto Von Biz Markie @wittgenfine]

The CIA is flooding white communities with cortisol

[𝙏𝙖𝙞𝙡𝙜𝙖𝙩𝙚 𝘽𝙚𝙚𝙧𝙨 @tailgate_beers]

0-1

[doug @douglerh]

@dirtbagqueer It’s over :(

[NYTPitchbot @DougJBalloon]

I have never been a supporter of Donald Trump, but if Democratic politicians are unable to stop themselves from using curse words, I will have no choice but to hold my nose and vote for him for the fourth time in 2028.