Drunk Gary Thorne

GOODBYE, HOME RUN!!!!!!!!!!! Off the floor and on the board! This is a parody account and isn't actually Gary Thorne.

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

This article is a treasure trove of valuable insights. Your content exchange is a treasure trove of wisdom. Thank you! Stephany Spray

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

#FreeKevinBrown

[Awful Announcing @awfulannouncing]

Exclusive: Orioles announcer Kevin Brown removed from booth for comments on lack of previous wins https://t.co/SadwXBiHNi

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

Orioles coming for you @Yankees

[MLB Network @MLBNetwork]

The Yankees have lost their 5th straight series.

[Ryan Ripken @ryanripkenshow]

Os Jays THEME Tonight:

Not how you start, it’s HOW YOU FINISH!

-Dean shook off 1st inning. Just seemed to get better and better. GAVE OFFENSE CHANCE to get back in game.

-Os didn’t blink down early, offense delivered & found way to pull ahead.

-RESILIENT EFFORT #Birdland

[Minor League Baseball @MiLB]

Fab-tastic!

@Orioles second-round pick Jud Fabian cranks pro home run No. 1 for the @shorebirds:

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

Four straight losses against an imaginary Orioles team that's not for real!

[Mike Wilner @Wilnerness]

#Bluejays loaded the bases with one out in top3, leading 2-0, but a double play ended the inning and they managed just two singles the rest of the way.

It's been a brutal couple of weeks.

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

Smile if your bacon is ACTUALLY HAM 🥓

[Toronto Blue Jays @BlueJays]

Smile if you hit LASERS 😃✌️ #PLAKATA

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

@BlueJays

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

ORIOLES WIN!!! Hey @BlueJays and @Wilnerness, PLEASE DRINK.................................... RESPONSIBLY!

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

YOUR BACON REMAINS NOT FOR REAL, YOU CANUCK

[Mike Wilner @Wilnerness]

This Orioles team remains not for real, by the way. #Bluejays

[WFAN Sports Radio @WFAN660]

A new report says the Yankees were "impressed" with Freeman, but Cashman said the team didn't have space in the budget for the former MVP:
https://t.co/nXr2Vmfu9r

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

@LeanderCards @keithlaw *accusations from over 20 women

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

Does that include the 20+ women who are accusing your new QB, Deshaun Watson, of heinous crimes?

[Cleveland Browns @Browns]

Happy #InternationalWomensDay to the incredible women that help make it all possibleHappy #InternationalWomensDay to the incredible women that help make it all possibleHappy #InternationalWomensDay to the incredible women that help make it all possibleHappy #InternationalWomensDay to the incredible women that help make it all possibleHappy #InternationalWomensDay to the incredible women that help make it all possibleHappy #InternationalWomensDay to the incredible women that help make it all possible!

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

Fuck you

[Trevor Bauer (トレバー・バウアー) @BauerOutage]

Congrats @deshaunwatson on the new contract! Can’t wait to watch you play again. Happy to see the @nfl and their franchises are allowing you to continue your career after all the BS and lies you’ve been through recently. Onward and upward. The game is more fun with you in it.

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

@BauerOutage @deshaunwatson @NFL Fuck you

[Sarah Spain @SarahSpain]

Also interested to hear whether the Browns spoke to any of his accusers before making the deal. We often hear that teams have "fully vetted" or "properly investigated" accused athletes, only to learn they've only spoken to friends & family. See: Winston.

[Drunk Gary Thorne @drunkgarythorne]

@kilocopter @1509lucky @SomeSportsTalk @SarahSpain 20+ women are accusing him. How many more need to accuse him before you believe them?

[Sarah Spain @SarahSpain]

As always, sports continue to teach us life's most important lessons...

[Sarah Spain @SarahSpain]

Let's start w/ the basic facts some of you seem willing to ignore: An NFL QB eschewed expert league/team massage therapists in favor of searching for them on instagram, then went to AT LEAST 50 different therapists, some unlicensed, one of whom was an ESTHETICIAN, not a masseuse.