SputNick

April, 1805.
Napoleon is master of Europe.
Only the British fleet stands before him.
Oceans are now battlefields.

[SputNick @dum_lucc]

I think my shared taxi driver is Saddam Hussein

[LindyMan @PaulSkallas]

The problem with places like Warsaw is that you are still living in polish culture. People aren't individuals liberated from their family or nation. So as an outsider it is like living in a grandmother's house.

Cities like Berlin, Paris, Amsterdam, London, Barcelona are places people to go to escape their country. So they form individual identities. Which makes being an expat enjoyable and easy to be in. Everyone is like you.

[johntheman_heiscome_heisme_PREACHTRUTHILLUMINATIPl @heiscomeheisme]

IN 1976 A MAN WAS SHOT DEAD IN BELFAST BY A MINOR REPUBLICAN PARAMILITARY THAT CLAIMED RESPONSIBILITY FOR ONLY ONE OTHER ATTACK ... HIS WOUNDS HAVE NEVER STOPPED BLEEDING ... THE BODY HAS BEEN KEPT BY MI5 AND IF YOU HAVE EVER HAD A BLOOD TRANSFUSION IN THE U.K HE WAS THE DONOR

[Lampshades @lampshades_2]

The people’s car

[FySStudios @getwrecked1939]

We're gonna need a bigger drive through.

[ꑭ 𝐹𝓇𝒾𝓉𝓏𓌏 @_Real_Fritz]

What did they mean by this?

[Grassophilia @Grassophile]

This fella is attempting to grow pumpkins in a PARKING LOT. The tick-infested brains of these lolcow pharmers will never cease to amaze. "Check out my CUCUMBERS I planted in DRYWALL." Renovate your property you disgusting degenerate. This looks like BURKINA FASO.

[gabe @allgarbled]

In western culture, a young white man traditionally signals his entry into upper middle class society by making a trip to Japan

[Tyler McBrien @TylerMcBrien]

Go to Paris. Go to a clothing-boutique-café that also has locations in New York and LA. Order a matcha that's indistinguishable from what you drink every day back home. Fuck it, order two. Post about it like you just discovered a hole in the wall hidden gem in Sarajevo or Shibuya

[Kaguya’s Top Gal @hayasaka_aryan]

“Your kikeness, he’s going to buy diarrhea medication”

“Excellent, send the most beautiful woman he’s even seen as the pharmacist”

“It’ll be done my lord”

[Nail (in SF 9/14 - 9/18) @NailYourShoes]

buddy dated an amputee one time, which is fine. you can do that. but then after they broke up he started dating another amputee

[josh @joshypooper]

opening up to a girl is like going into the future and killing yourself

[krus🪖 @krus_chiki]

first Dolly Parton and Tim Curry, now Ratko Mladić 😔 it really does come in 3s

[birdbath @birdbath]

I saw an Amish girl riding a longboard with a teenage boy whose mom sells me duck eggs at the farmers' market. Then I got a 24 pack of coors at Kwik Trip where a young woman with the highest facial harmony profile I've ever beared witness to was the cashier and she held direct eye contact while smiling at me 3 times. The midwest is a fertile haven of beauty if you're always a little drunk and learn to avert your gaze when fat people are in your field of vision

[Benton Swathford, MBA @BentonSwathford]

The best 5 minutes in a man’s life are when you just finished having sex and she goes to pee and you get to watch ig reels

[Samuel @kragthar3]

He blocks my check engine light, so I don’t have to worry lmao

[Cornelius Webster @DONTEVENGOLOL]

getting an adderall prescription so i can interrupt women faster and talk over them louder

[birdbath @birdbath]

After my dog died I didn't tell my vet so they kept filling his gabapentin prescription. I'd take half the bottle every other weekend which dispelled the encroaching malaise that's long haunted me. I knew I had to quit when I found myself genuinely enjoying watching Young Sheldon

[HowlingMutant @Howlingmutant0]

Wearing my “I WOULD NEVER FUCK A KID” sweatshirt to the toddlers birthday party so everyone can feel safe

[krus🪖 @krus_chiki]

We need to do something about the militarization of police because there’s no way Atlanta PD needs all that

[🦉Hootz🐍 🇵🇸 @YngviCom]

*realizing I've gone soft mid ride*

ah shitshitshit I'm so sorry, no no its fine I got it I just need you to lift your hips up for a sec

*grabs my snake charmers flute and proceeds to play a maybe culturally insensitive tune*