Kimberly Dutton

Eternal optimist with a cynical point of view.

[Kimberly Dutton @duttonk90]

I just want a man who gloats about me like @johnlegend does about @chrissyteigen and who teases me like @VancityReynolds messes with @blakelively

[Kimberly Dutton @duttonk90]

#TSxCapitalOne #Giveaway Say Don’t Go is my favorite #1989TaylorsVersion

[Capital One @CapitalOne]

Cardholders, your wildest dreams deserve to come true! Celebrate the release of #1989TaylorsVersion with a cardholder-exclusive travel mug.

1. Reply with #TSxCapitalOne & #Giveaway and tell us which #1989TaylorsVersion track you 🩵.
2. Use the link via reply to enter to win!

[The Hoarse Whisperer @TheRealHoarse]

Pretty bad time to be a disastrously bad real estate developer with hundreds of millions in debt coming due and your primary source of laundered money currently banned from world banks.

[Benjamin Ramm @BenjaminRamm]

During his inaugural address in 2019, Zelensky told lawmakers: “I do not want my picture in your offices: the President is not an icon, an idol or a portrait. Hang your kids' photos instead, and look at them each time you are making a decision.”

[jordan @JordanUhl]

Quite the narrative

[Angry Staffer @Angry_Staffer]

Listen, Apple screen time report — nobody wants to hear your shit this week.

[Nihilist Arby's @nihilist_arbys]

Nothing matters. She’s not coming back. Youre gonna die alone. Whenever it happens. You’re out of coke. All you have now is the darkened room, the 89 civic, tie pills and the bridge. And Arby’s

Enjoy Arby’s.

[Governor Kate Brown @OregonGovBrown]

Protect trans kids.

[Dan Price @DanPriceSeattle]

Interest is great. You put your money in a bank right now and get 0.5% interest but if you borrow from a bank your credit card has a 20% interest rate and your student loan charges 7%.

Almost like the whole system is designed to just siphon your money upward.

[Adam Rippon @AdamRippon]

This entire situation is heartbreaking. This young girl is just 15. She’s a minor. The adults around her have completely failed her. They’ve put her in this awful situation and should be punished.

[Wajahat Ali @WajahatAli]

Joe Rogan will be just fine, people. Don't worry. He'll be OK. If you are truly worried about free speech, and that's a big IF, let me direct you to CRT and book bannings across the country, and also this thing called mass voter suppression.

[Adam Rippon @AdamRippon]

When I arrived at the Olympics,
I was approached by Princess Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldi to compete and represent Genovia. I bravely declined.

[river buddy butcher 🤠 @rivbutcher]

if you can pretend that a groundhog is predicting the weather for the next six weeks, you can use they/them for a single person

[ACLU @ACLU]

BREAKING: In a 6-3 order, the Supreme Court turned its back on the suffering of people in Texas AGAIN, denying our request to proceed with our challenge to SB8, the most extreme abortion law in the country.

It’s a grim sign for the future of abortion rights.

[Dan Price @DanPriceSeattle]

"People in Europe live longer because of their Mediterranean diet"

*they can also get medical care without going bankrupt

[Craig Melvin @craigmelvin]

Your annual reminder: posting quotes from Dr. King one day out of the year but living a life that runs counter to his teachings the other 364 does not make you an ally in the fight for justice and equality.

[Alton Brown @altonbrown]

Guys, lack of courtesy can’t be blamed on “supply chain.”

[Kimberly Dutton @duttonk90]

My life right now.

[Tiffany C. Li @tiffanycli]

Stay indoors. But also return in person. Wear a mask. Not that one. The expensive one, that you can’t find. Take rapid tests. Which you also can’t find. But if you find them, don’t buy them. Rapid tests don’t work. You need PCR. There are zero appointments in your area.

[dave horwitz🪣 @Dave_Horwitz]

cdc says you can now die 5 days after watching the tape from the ring instead of 7