egg man

never poop anywhere

[competentposter @CompetentPoster]

@hastifliche Spitting out a mouthful of mulch in disbelief

[michael🇨🇴 @Iast_dayz]

Is this not insane

[egg man @eggman_666]

@thvfeetpics on the samsung fridge

[Bob @AryaGoonin]

why does closing your eyes while you’re driving feel so good

[Joshua Morris @dasgutegesucc]

@arrtnem @abbygov Alvin and the chipmunks sludgecore actually slaps

[Greg the Sorcerer @gregthesorcerer]

The little gnome i was frolicking with in a forest clearing just got swooped up by an eagle

[egg man @eggman_666]

@aliyahInterlude i think about shaving my eyebrows every day. ppl make it look sooo cool 🤩😣😣

[miranda @mirandareinert]

sometimes it’s like …….. iris by the goo goo dolls is the best song ever written

[Cora @PequodCora]

@aethergasm @GoodReddit The hunger games but it's all gay people

[egg man @eggman_666]

Speaking in tongues is always the perfect plan Y to any shenanigans gone awry. Plan Z is faking a seizure but you probably are going to need to pee yourself to really sell it.

[Darth Erogenous @darth_erogenous]

"From limb" has got to be one of the worst ways to be torn limb

[egg man @eggman_666]

@frogwithablog1 wtf 💀💀

[egg man @eggman_666]

IN A WEST END TOWN A DEAD END WORLDDDDD

[egg man @eggman_666]

no way they’re playing west end girls in the GTA strip club

[egg man @eggman_666]

i feel like the road signs are gaslighting me now, “loose gravel ahead” no there’s fucking not you liar

[Ian's Pizza Madison @IansMadison]

Time for some delicious #FreePizzaFriday!

Retweet this tweet and you'll be entered to win 8 free slice cards!

We'll pick one lucky winner on Monday morning!

[Shaun Johnson @ShyBucketGetter]

Sometimes I think about ending my life