Liz Humphrey

Texpat living in LA. Married to @jmlaub. I’m bad at Twitter.

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

In 2017, I paid Cards Against Humanityto protect a pristine plot of border land from Trump’s racist wall. But then an even richer, more racist billionaire—Elon Musk—stole my land and dumped his shit all over it. @ElonMusk owes me $100. #ElonOwesMe100Bucks https://t.co/M0aq5KQtVs

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

Hey @Apple, I would really like to be able to chat with all my friends without downloading a 3rd party app. #GetTheMessage
https://t.co/Ej9FLKC4Px

[Pokémon GO @PokemonGoApp]

To help you take on Shadow Mewtwo, we’re giving away codes for Purified Gems if we reach 150k RT! To participate:

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RT this post with #ShadowRaids
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If we reach our target, we’ll send participants a code for Shadow Raid–themed items!

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

#ShadowRaids

[Pokémon GO @PokemonGoApp]

To help you take on Shadow Mewtwo, we’re giving away codes for Purified Gems if we reach 150k RT! To participate:

Follow us on Twitter
RT this post with #ShadowRaids
Receive confirmation reply

If we reach our target, we’ll send participants a code for Shadow Raid–themed items!

[Matt Bellassai @MattBellassai]

i need to see the moment between will LAUGHING AT THE JOKE and him turning to see jada pissed off and realizing he gotta act

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

Last night in LA…

[José Piña @JosePinaEscoto]

Big Rig (slow) #pursuit! @LACoScanner @sgvscanner

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

@JonMoisan I just…. what

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

@andreasavage @truTV @netflix I miss I’m Sorry so much. It was one of my favorite shows! Bring it back please!! 😩

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

@DrafthouseLA Please let it be that you’re taking over the theater at the Americana in Glendale!! I would be ecstatic if there was an Alamo I could literally walk to anytime. 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

@ClarkKimberlyL I just watched and you were so funny! I look forward to seeing you live whenever live shows are a thing again!

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

@bessbell If you’re looking for a good pillow no joke this is the best one I’ve ever owned: https://t.co/oJLOv7jz0L

[Nathalie Baptiste 🇭🇹 @nhbaptiste]

Conservatives: LET THE FREE MARKET DECIDE
Free market: *decides*
Conservatives: this is outRAGEOUS

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

This is a really long thread (200 tweets!), but it’s worth your time.

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

@Lesdoggg You were great! ❤️

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

@Sarcasticluther Amy Grant’s “A Christmas Album” is the best of all time

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

@TheLiturgists Hey y’all!

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

😂🤣💀

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

I’ll never get tired of watching this.

[Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris]

We did it, @JoeBiden.

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

@mikemchargue What an amazing day 💗

[Liz Humphrey @ejayne]

Well, here it is. The tweet that made me start crying. 💗