Ely Stephens

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿🇰🇪 Certified drone op | Mechanical engineering ⚙️

[AV☆ @Karlwontmiss]

'Inarecord kweli' got to be coldest kenyan music intro

[No Context Dispatch @NoContextDsptch]

If buying isn't owning, then pirating isn't stealing.

[rene.pdf (draft) @odanga_r]

What the fuck is a “SUMMER festival” in Kenya? A country on the Equator?

I want you people to use your brains.

[UI/UX @Ajayfizzy]

Your friends when you give them access to your hotspot

[angeltbh @notyourhom60332]

Everyone when you start doing what’s best for you instead of what’s convenient for them.

[pops. @Mphod0lsk1]

Coffee dates aren’t safe anymore some of you are capable of ordering Ribs at 9AM

[Magatte Wade @magattew]

Ethiopia was never colonized.

For much of its history, it was one of the poorest countries on the continent.

Meanwhile, Vietnam was colonized by the French, devastated by decades of war, and is now on its way to serious economic prosperity.

If colonialism were the answer to why Africa is poor, Ethiopia should be rich and Vietnam should be broke. Neither is true.

Can we please retire this excuse?

[Waigoko Kimengemenge @jrobah]

I will be following her everywhere in the kitchen while she makes dinner nikiambiwa "na by the way sijakuambia...."

Mimi niko tu hapo na "enhe, aki na vile ako sponyo...." while handing her the shit she needs and being rewarded with a scoop to taste if the salt is enough

[Redback @chamugah]

Riding a motorbike from Kainuk to Lodwar via Lokichar.
Vijana marriage ikikataa nunua Bike utembee Kenya.

[LeRoy @LeeRussian]

Izo speed cams zinashika matatu? Ama this is not for PSVs

[𝕊𝕒𝕞𝕞𝕪 @FromN5_]

I PURPOSELY ignore hints so people can speak up and be direct like adults.

[3.0 TDI @Urunzii]

Nairobi is full of Driving school drop outs who switch lanes at the roundabout.

[Teddy Blank @teddypowday]

Your CEO should be strong.

Your CTO should be wise.

Your COO should be wicked, cunning, of mysterious origins, fluent in the dark arts, blurry in pictures,

[Manchester United @ManUtd]

BRUNO FERNANDES EQUALS THE PREMIER LEAGUE ASSIST RECORD.

[BBC Sport @BBCSport]

WHAT HAVE WE JUST WITNESSED? 🤯

Sabastian Sawe has just become the first person in history to run a sub two-hour marathon in race conditions.

Yomif Kejelcha was also under two hours for second!

[C @cyrusamanya]

Me when I hear my bro’s Subaru from a distance and I know I might wake up in Kigali with one shoe

[Finance Historian @BoardLotSultan]

Ziidi investors leo wanalala Kenyatta wakiwekwa maji. Weuh!
Give a hug to a ziidi trader near you

[Belion @GilbertBelion]

Exactly what a lot of guys would do.

[Simons @Simon_Ingari]

A Gen Z resigned, and left message for HR :

"The company can find a replacement in three days if I'm gone. But if I lose my health, I may never get it back."

The entire office fell silent instantly.