✨🎀extra🎀✨

Welcome back to me screaming

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

Just remember this when you’re celebrating this country: a gun is a right but education is not

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

I get phantom limb syndrome after I take off my acrylic nails

[Rachele Friedland @Rachele_F]

Kinda messed up people don’t wanna do things exactly how i like them done

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

@sadfamilydog Immediately yes

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

Got to work and there was a note that said “sex now” under my therapy chair so that’s a fun little mystery

[gay dean @peterjmarshall]

him: you better not be spongebob’s scary chair when I get home

me:

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

Me, living in the middle of the US where there are no mountains and no earthquakes: I probably can’t watch the Nepal Earthquake documentary because I’ll be too scared it’ll happen here

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

I have this audio on my tiktok all the time of someone scream-crying and people are like “I’ve never cried like this even over trauma/breakup etc” like I’ve cried like that over my door dash order being wrong

[Joe Rumrill @2tonbug]

Not my meek ass inheriting the earth…

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

“Your network is unstable” baby so am I, leave us alone

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

One thing about me, if you post a wedding album on fb I’m going through the whole thing and critiquing every piece of it to myself

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

When you’re having a problem and your friends sending pics of their pets doesn’t solve it

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

I sext my heterosexual girlfriends harder than Adam Levine sexts his mistress

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

I’ll never understand people who overwork when they’re stressed/anxious. Like have you tried avoidance? Depression naps? Crying? Shit hits

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

I’ll talk shit in soft rock every day of the year but the truth is I cry when Fix You comes on shuffle

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

What a fun pic of me at work!!

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

Finally a win for us crazy bitches

[✨🎀extra🎀✨ @em_birx]

My boss, who went on multiple vacations and renovated his entire house with his family during covid: covid was really hard on all of us 😢