emily✨

do ur squats, ear ur vegetables, wear red lipstick, don't let boys be mean to you. What do I do with my hands? Molloy Nursing

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

I don’t fuck with pessimism

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

@Starbucks are the five shots in the room with us right now? I am late to work for this? Ew

[gabe bergado @gabebergado]

watching shrek from memory in my head

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

@Venmo Venmo really asking for a handout rn. Smh

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

@lululemon 👐

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

@Venmo Im waiting....

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

Why do i want Walter White to be my dad

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

This but being told you smell good>>>>>

[Zack @Zack3O12]

Imaging trying to explain this picture to someone who doesn’t use twitter

[orion @orionvanessa]

My sexiest trait is that I’m left handed

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

Absolutely unhinged, i love it

[melody @MULCH_EATER]

Well, it happened. I accidentally pressed my joke Amazon dash button that orders a Kia Sorento.

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

Only if it's treasure island era

[PrincessMuppet @PrincessMuppet]

Therapy isn’t enough I need to meet The Muppets

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

Takes ibuprofen instead of Tylenol after a night of drinking *is a doctor*

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

Boomerss love screaming at automated menus on phones

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

Pro tip: Eat a $1.50 hot dog & soda combo from Costco when you're broke and hungry.

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

Yea fuck that baby im getting PAID

[emilio @emilio__oilime]

your wife is in labor and you're rushing her to the hospital. you get in a cab and it turns out to be the cash cab. do you play or not

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

My thoughts exactly

[joshua @goshjosh02]

I said what I said

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

@AManLikeSteveo Miss you more😢

[emily✨ @emjohnson57]

Sending people flowers and buying them coffee is my love language.