Eric Kristensen

Marginally-famous regional celebrity My other car is a fire engine. Let’s be friends.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

Pope Leo XIV will serve for 27 years…then determine the religion is “too old for him now” —- and find a younger, hotter religion.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

I don’t post on social media often, but when I do…it’s because I’m bragging about getting both the van & truck in the garage before a big snow. ❄️

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@alexquigley No.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

Inception, only instead of dreams it’s quartiles.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@EddieVolkman I’m so sorry for your loss.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@DoctorRhodes 😂

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@alexquigley CARY!

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@DoctorRhodes Dammit.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@TheRealRion @laurenoneil @Q101Chicago @TimVirgin @BrianJHaddad @RadioMadison @KQXJustin We all have our guilty pleasures.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

If you know, you know. 😂

[Taco Bell @tacobell]

55 crunchy tacos
55 soft tacos
55 bean burritos
55 cheesy roll ups
55 sausage breakfast crunchwraps
100 nacho fries
100 cheesy fiesta potatoes
100 doritos locos tacos (supreme)
100 crunchwraps
100 mexican pizzas
55 steak quesadillas
55 beefy melt burritos
55 spicy potato soft tacos
55 cinnabon delights
55 baja blasts
and
155 sauce packets

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

Aging like a fine sparking wine … 🍷

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

The @Cubs led off the game with a HR. Would have been nice to watch it. Hate these one-off streaming games… 😡

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@manchild3000 Long story, but the short version: WalMart.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

Jackpot. 🥃

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@TheRealRion That really means a lot, thnx! All is well! Just been resting up and living life, waiting to see where I go next creatively.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@DoctorRhodes Every hour, ON the hour 😂

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

My 5 year old stepson has overplayed more hit music on his Google than a Top 40 radio station.

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

@PaulMiller1313 “Mountain At My Gates” by @foals is his current hyper fixation. Proud papa, but also burnt out. 😂

[Fall Out Boy @falloutboy]

new achievement unlocked in the @nytimes mini crossword 👌🏼

[Eric Kristensen @erickristensen]

How are all the joints & backs doin’ out there?!?