Jared

[Jared @FargoJared]

exercising my right to remain silent by never answering phone calls

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

Idea: An anonymous “vote to end meeting” button on Teams where if 50% of people press it, the meeting ends immediately.

[Dominic Pino @DominicJPino]

Imagining explaining to the Founding Fathers that the president imposed tariffs without an act of Congress and then removed them at the request of the King of England

[Mike Drucker @MikeDrucker]

The names of kings have been worn away by the sands of time. Gods once feared are forgotten. Monuments to the immortality of civilizations now shattered into the cobblestones of another. But one man shall survive forever because he was a really, really shitty copper merchant.

[Everything Price Sufferer (but especially eggs) @agraybee]

Could you imagine if there were journalists whose beat was covering magicians, but they think magic is real, so they're always breathlessly reporting on the lady they saw cut in half.

[KAMTRANADA @kkammk]

You screaming “JESUS JESUS JESUS” on stage but when it’s time to put your faith to work and do what Jesus would do you’re on mute. This performative Christianity is ridiculous

[Ron Iver @ronnui_]

My god, I just realized I'm now closer to 30 than I am to 20 (I'm 36)

[one dozen rats at a keyboard @PanasonicDX4500]

this chart is saying something other than what it thinks it’s saying.

[Meidas_Charise Lee @charise_lee]

AND THERE YOU HAVE IT‼️

[nick catucci @catucci]

Most thoughtful take I’ve seen on sports betting, from the great @liz_franczak

https://t.co/uLPGWnREsD

[Jared @FargoJared]

@oliviacarr hope the drive thru can fit a twin size

[Jake Olson @JakeOlson61]

League source confirms Marcus Freeman declined the Giants HC job after the NFL rejected his proposal for the team to set its own schedule and receive an automatic playoff berth each year.

[DEI speedwagon (all eyes on Cuba) 🌹🇵🇸 〽️ @uhshanti]

he finally got an honest-to-god certifiable elite pedophile conspiracy and instead he has to do this. an almost divine punishment

[Warren Gunnels @GunnelsWarren]

Republicans: If Mamdani establishes a handful of government-owned grocery stores to make life more affordable there will be bread lines all over NY.

Also Republican Congresswoman: I love saving money at the government-owned grocery store that’s 100% funded by the Pentagon.

[onionweigher 🧅⚖️ @onionweigher]

there are so many instances of archeologists puzzling over particularly confusing artifacts which were made by some guy doing pretty much this

[Street Medic @RndmStreetMedic]

Imagine if they offered this to medical students, nursing students, and students looking to go into research. Imagine what our country could look like instead.

[ArtButMakeItSports @ArtButSports]

The Flight of Moloch, by William Blake, 1815

[SILENCED Brandon @PrettyBadLefty]

They should make Air Bud a chocolate lab so we can finally have a outrage cycle so stupid the discourse literally kills people

[milena☆ @milenadraws]

if i saw this i would not believe my eyes