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[Ayo @Alhajirostova]

American: So there are terrorists causing problems in your country, right?

Nigerian: Yes.

American: That's terrible. Is the government at least doing something about it?

Nigerian: Well, our president addressed the issue.

American: Oh. What did he say?

Nigerian: He spoke about the law of lawf in the holy book

American: ...The law of love?

Nigerian: I guess

American: Okay. Did you send the military after them?

Nigerian: Hmm... at times.

American: What do you mean "at times"?

Nigerian: Sometimes we've heard the military went after them. In some cases, the terrorists ended up killing military personnel.

American: Wait. They killed your soldiers?

Nigerian: Yes.

American: Okay, so then your government retaliated and finished them off, right?

Nigerian: Mm... nah.

American: What do you mean "nah"?

Nigerian: Well, our president also gave an example from the Bible about the prodigal son on how we should accept them with love.

American: Hold on. The prodigal son?

Nigerian: Yes.

American: I'm confused. So you're telling me terrorists killed military personnel, and the response was a Bible lesson?

Nigerian: Something like that.

American: So you guys aren't doing anything?

Nigerian: No, no. We're doing something.

American: Okay. What are you doing?

Nigerian: We're rehabilitating the ones we catch.

American: You're... rehabilitating them?

Nigerian: Yes.

American: Not prosecuting them?

Nigerian: Not according to our president, no.

American: WTF WTF WTF

Nigerian: I never even tell you anything, you don dey cry

[Oluwadamilare Fabiyi of #Geni @therealFadaca]

So we all agree that LGs are not constitutionally recognized as an autonomous tier of government.

Why then did Tinubu go to the Supreme Court to get that pointless interpretation being politically implemented in only state ?

The solution is constitutional amendment, just like the state police. This has been Seyi Makinde stance on the LG autonomy and state police that they were being used to play politics.

What requires constitutional amendment should not be done with executive powers or judicial powers.

[Omo Kogi (Yagba) 🌍 @harrysone9]

Nigerians are always quick to move on, but if this pops up on your timeline, repost it; it costs you zero naira.

It’s been three weeks now.

[👑S.A.L.A.K.O🕊 @UnkleAyo]

The Nigerian Police Force have rescued Adelabu's kidnapped family under 72H.

Under 3days.

46 children and their teachers, are still in captivity after 3 weeks.

If the entire workforce in Oyo state isn't occupying the streets next week - all of you are fools.

[Kashyap Sriram @kashyap286]

Firstly, Ethiopia is under US sanctions while Vietnam is not. And speaking of former French colonies, Haiti was the first to get independence (1804) and is still one of the poorest countries in the world because of the debt they had to take on to gain independence (it took them until 1947 to fully repay it!). Whereas, New Caledonia is still a French colony and is neither rich nor poor.

"If colonialism were the answer to why Africa is poor..."

This line completely ignores the European powers' (and US) post-colonial control over Africa. Patrice Lumumba, the first democratically elected leader of the DRC, was tortured and killed by Belgium and the US for being a nationalist. His body was dissolved in acid so he wouldn't become a martyr. His legacy is largely unknown even within the continent. Several other such "lessons" were meted out. Google Thomas Sankara (Burkina Faso) and Sylvanus Olympio (Togo).

Once you set the example, you gain obedience. The VietCong, on the other hand, didn't surrender even though 3 million Vietnamese died during the war, and several thousand more continue to die to this day (!) from Agent Orange exposure.

As for former French colonies in Africa, France still controls their currency and holds their central bank reserves in France. As Rothschild purportedly said, "permit me to issue and control the money of a nation, and I care not who makes its laws."

Third, the borders in Africa were drawn in such a way that conflict was inevitable. At the Berlin Conference in 1884-85, the European powers simply carved up the continent by drawing straight line borders. African leaders were conspicuous only by their absence at this historic event which shaped the next century. This is why Cameroon, a French-speaking country, has a minority English-speaking territory, ensuring it remains destabilized. Likewise for West Asia/the Middle East, where the Sykes-Picot legacy lives on.

@magattew conflates formal colonial rule with colonial control. Vietnam managed to fully kick out both France and the US, reunified the North and the South, and kept its sovereignty. All African leaders who attempted the same have been systematically eliminated (see Muammar Gaddafi, Libya's divisive leader, for a recent example), ensuring Africa forever bears the open wounds of its colonial legacy.

But Ms. Wade is right on one thing: Vietnam owes its prosperity to overcoming colonial rule. Maybe Africa can become prosperous if Africans do the same.

[Seyi Makinde @seyimakinde]

Congratulations to our Shooting Stars Sports Club (3SC) on achieving a top 3 finish in the Nigerian Premier Football League (NPFL). Although our celebrations are muted in the light of the current circumstances, we acknowledge your determination and hard work which got you to this point.

The goal was to move from relegation in 2019, back to the NPFL and then to finish top 3 in order to compete at the continental level. Well done for achieving this goal! Let's continue to aim for more.

[Oluwadamilare Fabiyi of #Geni @therealFadaca]

Ancient days hunters with Dane guns fight infiltrators with Dane guns. Hunters with Dane guns cannot fight infiltrators with AKs.

The solution is similar to this, make modern day policing local with the same resources that the infiltrators have.

The federal government will not give state policing and now we have Amotekun.

WHY IS FEDERAL GOVERNMENT NOT ALLOWING AMOTEKUN TO CARRY AKs?????

[Chelsea FC @ChelseaFC]

WE’VE DONE IT!! 💙💙

[ajala.ray @fielsray]

Best squad announcement!

[Fotballandslaget @nff_landslag]

Our World Cup Squad 🇳🇴

[Shooting Stars SC @ShootingSc]

UNITY CUP CALL-UP 🇳🇬💚

Big congratulations to Ayobami Junior on earning a call-up to the Super Eagles squad for the upcoming Unity Cup.

#3SC #MidfieldMaestro #SuperEagles

[OurFaveOnlineDoc 🇬🇧 🇳🇬 @OurFavOnlineDoc]

A 69-year-old woman who retired from NPA cries while demanding unpaid 16 years pension at the NPA entrance gate.

Just imagine this level of callous satanic wickedness. How can someone’s pensions be unpaid for 16years yet politicians don’t care.

MADNESS.

[Seyi Makinde @seyimakinde]

As promised, we met with service commanders and heads of security agencies in Oyo State this evening to receive an update on the kidnapping incident in Oriire LGA.

Subsequently, I held a press briefing where I also answered questions from the press including one on the surveillance aircraft we procured which are currently being reassembled in Lagos. Watch the video for more details.

[Have faith🗯 @JuanHeart2016]

✅4× Premier League winner
✅UEFA Champions League winner
✅Europa League winner
✅5× FA Cup winner
✅Premier League record holder for most ✅clean sheets (202)
✅124 caps for Czech Republic

One of the greatest goalkeepers in football history🧤

Happy Birthday to a Chelsea legend 💙

[Elvis Tunde @Tunnykvng]

I don’t know who needs to hear this but the Champions of the World are bigger than the Champions of England

[Aproko Doctor Global @aproko_doctor]

I am sick to my stomach watching that video of the teacher being beheaded in Oyo State.

You dedicate your life to teaching mathematics and building the next generation, only to be abducted and slaughtered.

This is not life!

The primary duty of ANY government is the protection of lives. If a teacher cannot even be safe inside a classroom, then nobody is safe. Security operatives are dying, and citizens are bleeding. We are not angry enough!

We cannot normalise this madness. The government must wipe out these monsters and bring the remaining teachers home alive. My heart bleeds for Mr Oyedokun. He did not deserve this. My deepest condolences go to his family.

Please @oyostategovt @seyimakinde @NGRPresident. Something HAS to be done!

[𝙵𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚋𝚘𝚢 ✞𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚎 @fineboytunde_]

They've started kidnapping people in ogun state o!!!!!!

They've infiltrated ogun state properly, and nobody is saying anything.

Schools are not opening in imagbon close to Isara Remo ogun state cause of bandits, They've entered ogun state.

Why is this not making headlines💔

[Chelsea FC @ChelseaFC]

Debut season. 👏

[Adedayo Agarau @adedayoagarau]

By Friday, President and past governors 🤙🏾

[Hauwa 🌟🌬 @Hauwa_L]

You cannot rehabilitate a person that beheads a person.

You cannot rehabilitate someone that offs people for sport.

You cannot rehabilitate someone that kidnaps and rapes children.

[First Officer Felix™ 王明 @phlexyl]

I survived a kidnap attempt on my way to Lagos from Ibadan along the Lagos-Ibadan Expressway — around Ajebo, Ogun State.

At about 7:30pm, one of them suddenly jumped out from the bush carrying two heavy objects, trying to force my car to stop.

He threw the first object directly in front of my car while I was negotiating a slight bend. I managed to swerve around it, then he threw the second one. Before the others could position themselves, I brushed the main guy that attacked with my car and sped off.

Thankfully, I escaped alive, but my bonnet, bumper, headlamps, and fender were badly damaged.

Omo… no be country una dey live ooo.