Someone needs to hear this: cutting people out of your life who bring dysfunction and suffering into your life is the first sign you're starting to respect yourself.
The daughter who was told she was the "easy" child who puts everyone before herself. She walks around dissociated & anxious, daydreaming of a fantasy life. But you'd never know because she's a master at looking like she has it all together.
All of your relationships will get better when you learn you don't need to react to or fix people's problems. People just want to be heard and accepted. Maturing is realizing that everyone is capable and your role is to not be anyone else's savior.
People aren’t concerned with what’s true. They’re driven to believe what makes them feel most comfortable. Especially if it helps them avoid dark parts of themselves.
Self-love is learning to choose yourself over your feelings for others. It's learning to trust patterns, not promises. It's learning to walk away from toxic people even when they mean the most to you. It's learning to heal and move on without an apology. It's learning to forgive and forget people who don’t deserve you. It's learning to raise and stand by your standards. It's learning to stop punishing yourself for your mistakes. It's learning to love all of you—who you've been, who you are, and who you're becoming.
It's hard to be the black sheep.
But it also gives you resilience, empathy, and the ability to break the cycle.
This Is For The Black Sheep:
(A THREAD🧵)
Someone that loves you will put in their best effort to communicate with you. No matter how poorly worded, or non-sensical, or emotional, or imperfect their attempts may seem, they'll keep trying to sort things out. They'll keep trying to better understand and be better understood by you. They'll keep putting in the effort to make things work because they'd rather risk looking stupid for trying than risk losing you.
Time does not heal all wounds. That’s why many people in their 80s are miserable, regretful, and bitter. Having someone listen with empathy heals wounds. Taking steps outside your comfort zone heals wounds. Letting yourself cry heals wounds. Physical touch from someone you trust heals wounds.
my hot take is i don’t think anybody should be dating until their shit is together. eating healthy, working out regularly, having a morning routine, a spiritual practice, a therapist, financial discipline. things like that have to come first.