A lot of men create enemies by telling the truth in the most humiliating way possible. If you want influence inside real hierarchies, learn how to disagree without making the other person feel reduced, because once ego gets involved, people stop responding to logic and start defending pride.
Standards are contagious. Your environment teaches you what to tolerate before it teaches you what to achieve. If you stay around disorder long enough, chaos feels normal. If you stay around disciplined people long enough, excuses start feeling embarrassing.
Being morally clean won’t protect you from wolves. Being strategically useful will. In the real world, you aren’t judged by your heart, you’re judged by your leverage. You’re either an asset or a liability. Stop asking to be liked. Become too valuable to ignore.
The most seductive trait isn’t charm, it’s self-sufficiency. Need nothing. Desire little. Let others chase the mystery of your restraint. When you are full without them, they become obsessed with being your missing piece.
unlearn shame. all forms of shame: unemployment, illness, vulnerability, longing, desire, errors, failures. you do not need to feel ashamed of what you are experiencing or living. freedom and shame cannot coexist.
“Peller you get money buy car 200m naira, as them day give am make e give us too”
- Street thug, Inside Lagos, Daylight Rbbrs Disguised as Beggars 😳
A disturbing look at the growing problem of touts and street extortion in Lagos. Interview by kizitolid
This is going to sound crazy.
But, one of the skills you must learn in the near future is how to cope with an increasingly illiterate society of emotionally dysregulated people.
If you continue to get frustrated on a daily basis over how everything seems dumb, stress is going to silently jeopardize your health.