Claude Remains

Ill tempered. Future world overlord. Ginger. Artist. Hypocondriac. Strange person. SQUIRREL!

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Hey @FNBSA just some feedback. But calm down with the marketing 3 back to back in less than 2 hours today. this is excluding the 5 sales calls yesterday.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

@MTNza I have been dealing with issues since May when one of your sales agents phoned me to upgrade my contract. Since then he has been ducking and diving my messages and calls. EVERY SINGLE 135 agent gives me another number or email address to contact. No one is stepping up.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Hey @KFCSA why am I waiting for a reply?

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Hey @KFCSA so tell me, whats wrong here?

Missing 2 sauces and one of the 3 is a repeat?

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

@heidiklum being back on Project Runway means I start watching it again.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Hey @Uber_RSA if this is one of your drivers he needs a serious talking to. Blocking an intersection and decides to swear and throw fingers when he got hooted at.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Met my bfs parents for the first time this weekend and I would not have expected to have to sleep in the spare room as a grown man because his mom says “in this house we only share a bed if we’re married. “

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

This week has been great. Sinusitis. Followed by my debit card being cloned. Always. Fun.

[Dollz @dollaflaps]

Abracadabra by ukrainian orchestra 🇺🇦 How can you not say HIT

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Bonus about getting a boyfriend? Discovering you’re both the same size.
Just doubled my wardrobe for free.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Episode 2 of Last of Us hey

Ouch.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Will the first print on my 3D printer be a cockring? Probably

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Nothing prepares you for the smell of a rotten potatoe.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

All I want in life is to be able roll a wrap like a Kauai mammie or a level 6 vegan.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Have you ever just looked at someone and thought “why are you such a dumb cunt?”

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Not this guy (on grindr) having the balls to tell me if I really wanted to meet him I would have made it happen… but he went offline after me making plans with him for 5 days.

Okay sure buddy.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

So block on grindr is now called hide? Okay. Someone was oversensitive

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Wow. America really is turning into a shit show right?

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

The amount of twinks suddenly messaging me on grindr and very blatantly telling me they’re looking for a “blesser”. Haibo, when did this sugar daddy thing happen? They’re like the call centres of online dating.

[Claude Remains @fluxmeslowly]

Nothing worse than going for an empty parking spot only to discover a Kia Picanto.