Pulling my pants up as I stand up from the toilet and feeling something squishy in my pocket before I spin around in a panic to see my phone, wallet, and keys disappear down the toilet. A sullen look washes over my face as I slowly feel my pocket once again.
Human not meant to farm plant, raise animal. Human meant to find in woods, chase with spear. What next, human go to moon? … just thought that first time… would be so cool…
Jerry Seinfeld might’ve been on to something. Like actually what is the fucking deal with airline food, it sucks so fucking bad for no reason. I do not think that he should’ve been dating that teenage girl.
If I were a mouse or a rabbit or some other wild animal out when it was cold and rainy I’d be hiding in a corner sobbing like “this sucks so fucking bad I hate this this sucks”