gurth

twitter fingers turn to chicken fingers

[gurth @gurth18]

Great to see players getting a second chance in Vegas. First Eichel coming back from his neck injury, then Marner getting away from the leafs drama and then Carter Hart for whatever he did I forget

[gurth @gurth18]

@frogshit720 I saw one drinking a piña colada last time I was at trader Vic’s

[gurth @gurth18]

Sometimes I see cool stuff on threads and go to twitter and search the exact same thing so I can send it to someone so I don’t get clowned for using threads

[gurth @gurth18]

Lately it’s been hitting me that I’ll probably never get nardwuared in my life and I’m having a hard time with that.

[gurth @gurth18]

@humphrey38 Meow Zedong

[Rob Gucci @heatdaddy69420]

Seriously thank you to the brave astronauts of NASA for being courageous enough to go into uncharted territories for the sake of advancing humanity. Fearless innovators risking their lives.

Thank you 🇺🇸

[gurth @gurth18]

@frogshit720 That’s why it’s called an accident not your fault (I’m driving right now)

[gurth @gurth18]

@humphrey38 @grok Grok more like Brok always asking for a dollar

[gurth @gurth18]

Unlimited money glitch

Get dash pass to waive delivery fee

Order chipotle delivery and tip $0
No one wants to pick that shit up

You pick that shit up
You eat it because it’s yours

DoorDash pays you $6 for picking it up

Repeat this every day for a year
Only lose like $4,000

[gurth @gurth18]

@humphrey38 Damn this blew up

[gurth @gurth18]

People like to ignore the fact that you can fit a round peg in a square hole as long as it fits and it isn’t too big

[gurth @gurth18]

What did people keep in their right pocket before they had phones

[gurth @gurth18]

Gonna go as the number 53 for Halloween. Prime number type shit

[gurth @gurth18]

Technically you’re allowed to sports bet while driving because you’re not really texting anyone

[gurth @gurth18]

If I was a chicken I’d want them to make me into chicken fries

[gurth @gurth18]

Telling kids they can be president is like being a cow and told you’re gonna be a nice juicy steak and then they cut off your butt and turn it into a whopper

[gurth @gurth18]

Is it still gonna be chill to use rap lyrics in instagram captions when we’re 80? I just wanna start planning ahead

[elena @grnformicatable]

abandon your boy

[🅿️ @the_P_God]

Mac and no second monitor = fake job