Gemma Staniforth

Scientist. Solicitor. KFC champion.

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

“Literature frees the mind, but smut tethers you to the earth, and don't you forget it.” - Buddy Dieker, #Ozark. Love this old guy.

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

@sewateruk No water on Norwood Gardens, Ashford. Not appearing on your aquAlerter map yet.

[Omid Djalili @omid9]

Morality police attacks a woman not wearing hijab in a car. Watch her fight back despite getting punched in the face.

To the undecided men: choose a side. And for the sake of humanity make interventions. This woman is all women of Iran. You’d do well to support them.

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

Thank you Joseph Heller for making me laugh out loud, even when my mood is low. Amongst many other qualities, Catch-22 is endlessly entertaining. Genius 👌

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

@InPostUK disgraceful that you are telling me to dispose of a poor customer’s parcel because you put two delivery labels on it and misdelivered it to me, even though all her details and the correct label are there to make this right. Why? You don’t collect. @BBCWatchdog

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

@TheGymGroup Hello, a number of months ago you agreed my request to freeze my membership, however contrary to that agreement you have continued deducting full membership costs. You have not replied to my email or DM. Please will you contact me to arrange the refund?

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

Lot of love for the author of this particular succession of subtitles.

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

@LmStaniforth @VodafoneUK Oh my goodness, you are such a sweetie, how lovely! Love you sis 🥰😘 xxxx

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

These good news emails are a bitch.

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

A pirate: someone who risks their life at sea, to bring disaster to other people.

Why do I love this definition so.

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

My word, what a generous yolk from such an ickle egg 😃😋

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

@robbacrab Haha! Yes, my neighbours music right now sounds like it’s just coming from a room next to me, so I’m definitely very much at the party! 😂😅

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

Tapping to remove a wall tile in the kitchen. There will be many tiles to remove. Neighbour already banging on walls for me to be quiet. 🙄

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

@robbacrab Yeah, I don’t think that’s going to happen - Tier 4 👋 Also can’t really plan particular days as you’re at the mercy of the trade persons schedule, for the noisiest jobs. Real problem is that the party walls, I’ve discovered, are paper thin. Argh!

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

@robbacrab Congrats for nearing the end of your DIY journey! Hope you’re pleased with the results :) I love DIY and I’ve just moved into a house in need of major refurbishment throughout but hoping to tackle it all in a relatively short space of time 🤞 Will have to charm the neighbours...!

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

@robbacrab Ha! I was only planning on doing the one tile today as a test, but I’ll take their impatient reaction as a bad sign of things to come... Will warn them ahead of the real works (of which there are many - eek!)

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

Ah yes, the UK: Scotland, Wales, NI and...

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

Ohhh... those DIY starts that lie.

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

I think 20 paint samples from the Farrow & Ball range will just have to do.

[Susie Dent @susie_dent]

In the past, you could be reckful (considerate) as well as reckless. People were also gormful (careful); feckful (responsible), ruthful (compassionate), wieldy (agile), ept (adroit), and definitely gruntled.

Bring back the lost positives.

[Gemma Staniforth @gem_myS]

@_GlennHarris Lovely message 😊 Hope you’ve had an equally lovely day. Happy birthday! x