doctor johnny bananas🥄

gem | she/they | uk | science witch | world's boringest goth | accidental chronic illness tweeter | hope you like endless pictures of my giant dog

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

• shitty eyesight
• always eating
• high-pitched yelling
• tiny but spooky

conclusion: I am a bat

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@Stormrunner1981 @BadMedicalTakes yeah endo runs in my family (on both sides!) and every single person who had a hysterectomy for that said the same as you about how the pain compares

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@Etanarachel @RottenInDenmark It isn't. But it IS gross to then suggest that transitioning is something autistic teens only do because they want to fit in at school, because it implies they're not capable of figuring out their identity for themselves.

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@speakoutsister I have endometriosis- I've been in a flare-up for the last three days and that's still less painful than listening to a known transphobe chatting shit about how all I need is a man to hold the door for me. THANKS GRAHAM, I'M CURED.

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@BadMedicalTakes "real women don't dilate" oh shit better throw away my medical devices and all the progress I've made with my chronic pain condition then, thanks twitter user tinygirl_dolly for knowing more than my whole gyno team!

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@fuckyouiquit UK, <£10 a month in prescription charges. The birth control, physio, and medical devices I use to manage endometriosis are free at the point of use via the NHS. The only thing I ever went private for is autism assessment, which is also free on the NHS but with a long wait.

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

My last rib on my left side has a corner at the front instead of curving smoothly around like all the others. It doesn't cause any issues, it just looks weird.

[Vivian @suchnerve]

the only thing funnier than realizing your autism as an adult is how many of your friends also find THEY'RE autistic as adults, which makes you retroactively realize that you have such specific taste in friends because you've been gravitating toward your own neurotype all along.

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

I've barely been on here in ages and I've just come back to "it's hypocritical and attention-seeking for an asexual person to wear a vest top and a skirt that ends just above the knee". See you in another three months I guess lmao

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@inmywilddaze @ask_aubry Honestly same 😂

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@GrumpyMPAGrad Hahaha I KNEW you'd love it 🖤

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@JoannaNoBanana Being autistic! I wasn't surprised to get officially diagnosed and I knew it would be having some effect on my physical health, but I didn't realise just how much of an impact it has until I started reading up on co-occurring conditions and all my disabilities were on the list 😅

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

"It's your anxiety" nope.
"It's your antidepressants" nope.
"You're just afraid of sex because of your pelvic pain" nope.
"It's your birth control" nope.
"Autistic people don't have those feelings" NOPE.

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

It's #DIsabledAceDay! Just about all of my disabilities- including my neurodivergence- have been treated as reasons I'm ace, and so have most of the treatments for my physical and mental health. Pro tip: don't do that. Asexuality isn't a medical problem- or caused by one.

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@GrumpyMPAGrad Well now I can't even say I don't like mayo without accidentally giving myself away 😂

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

@BadMedicalTakes "Faking fertility with makeup" ok then why am I using it to look extra dead

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

Literally every medicine I take has some dipshit going "it only takes your symptoms away!!!" as if that's not exactly why I take them. Fucking hell.

[doctor johnny bananas🥄 @gempire_bat]

"Painkillers just mask the pain, they don't remove it" sir what exactly do you think a painkiller is