haley

I was hiding under your porch because I love you

[haley @haleybridges]

@e_gala_oost That place is a core memory

[haley @haleybridges]

@e_gala_oost EL AZTECA

[haley @haleybridges]

I’m still here I’m just tired

[haley @haleybridges]

@aspiringamanda Weddings are so much more fun to plan when you don’t do what people tell@you to do. Wedding prices for shit are a sham. No one believed I did it under 6k (I mean it’s a good thing it never happened but still 😅)

[haley @haleybridges]

My friend got in my car the other day and went “ah.. it smells like.. dog?” Is that really a question?

[haley @haleybridges]

Lol guys I didn’t realize I was working for a catholic healthcare system until my orientation. Didn’t think much of it until I just noticed my health insurance doesn’t cover contraceptives 🙃 I have A LOT OF WORDS

[haley @haleybridges]

@allisonzito When I was putting together valentines for a 3 year olds class I was sure to NOT put these types of things in lol

[haley @haleybridges]

How is New Hampshires motto “live free or die” when they haven’t regulated recreational marijuana? Live free or get fined 25k for carrying less then an Oz

[haley @haleybridges]

@e_gala_oost Let’s get drunk with your follicles

[haley @haleybridges]

I’m overnighting him

[haley @haleybridges]

I never want to hear someone say “terrible twos” again. who the fuck thinks it’s two? Terrible threes. It’s three. It’s always been three.

So anyone want a free 3 year old?

[haley @haleybridges]

@AllieMUrban Maybe one day I’ll get there

[haley @haleybridges]

Got my new work schedule (that can include weekends and evenings) and it’s like my supervisor KNEW to give me off superbowl weekend and the Monday after 👏🏼 #gobirds

[haley @haleybridges]

The house I rent is owned by a hoarder, most of the stuff has been removed since except for one room in the basement where the HVAC guy just said “you could open at 1970s tv repair shop down here.” Not even an exaggeration.

[haley @haleybridges]

I was getting ready to leave (late) for work. I hear our gate open, and it happens to be the oil guy we’ve been waiting for to fix the leak in our tank, no one told us. I’m choosing to call this moment “fate” rather than “poor time management” of me running 20 minutes late 😅

[haley @haleybridges]

If you’re wondering where I’m at today, I’m standing in the kitchen just eating mozzarella balls.

[haley @haleybridges]

@mikeyXD Yep… checked it… someone took it out and never put it back 🙃

[haley @haleybridges]

I locked my keys in the house, car keys included. At least I left my car unlocked to sit and wait for someone to unlock the house as I contemplate life choices.

[haley @haleybridges]

This year, we are playing the game “how long can I avoid getting an oil refill.” Yes, my house is cold.

[haley @haleybridges]

It was the year without a pigmas card