ＨＫＭ

bitch where

[poppa @popitforpoppa]

when a girl says “5 mins” think about it like five minutes left in the 4th quarter and both teams have all their timeouts

[jon drake @DrakeGatsby]

“Hope you’re all feeling refreshed after the break” I binge-drank and ate nothing but sugar for 10 days it’s a miracle I’m alive

[michael @FilledwithUrine]

made up a situation. i’m pissed

[anu @anuatluru]

there should be a "take your friend to work day" so we can actually see what our friends do all day and meet the characters from all their work stories

[pj @pjayevans]

I wish you could google what’s that noise outside

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

honestly RUDE that it’s already time to figure out another stupid little dinner. just did that yesterday, goddamn

[@dfarecs @lethalrejection]

and if i said olivia rodrigo adults and disney adults are cousins

[trish @ultragloss]

hot summer nights mid july when you and i were forever wild

[☆ CRAY ☆ @craymusic]

Unfortunately I’m displaying signs of needing a sweet little treat

[no @zedonarrival]

“SCOTUS has ruled—”

[jen @jennasnewaccoun]

Life is so beautiful and precious after two cocktails & an appetizer

[ryann @ryannnhudsonnn]

Cacio e pepe for dinner (Annie’s white cheddar Mac and cheese with pepper)

[𝓺𝓾𝓮-𝓿𝓲𝓷🇸🇻 @kevosmin]

Jwow lives in my mind rent free

[pj @pjayevans]

My buddy who works at Area 51 told me Puss in Boots is real

[grace @brainsoupp_]

i love it when my pets sigh like what ails you my little unemployed freeloader

[AIDA @shutupaida]

aesthetic moms that make their babies play with brown wooden toys like they’re Danish slaves. ur baby has a bad life