Top Tweets for #BadPreFlightInstructions
#BadPreFlightInstructions in the case of a water "landing" your body will most likely be come part of the circle of life.
If we crash into a mountain please collect your skis before exiting the plane. You will need them for the descent #BadPreFlightInstructions
#BadPreFlightInstructions Please secure your scorpion in the overhead compartment
Please try not to get hit over the head with a stroller! #BadPreflightInstructions
Herb Dean will be the third man in the Octagon tonight.
#BadPreFlightInstructions
#BadPreFlightInstructions
In case of emergency, put your head between your knees and kiss your ass goodbye!
#BadPreFlightInstructions There is nothing on the wing!

#BadPreFlightInstructions Our airport looks like a paper airplane, but don't worry our pilot knows oragami!

#BadPreFlightInstructions
When flying out of Los Angeles:
In case of water landing your neighbor can be used as a flotation device.
#badpreflightinstructions We apologize, we seemed to have overbooked. Who wants to "volunteer" to give up their seat? Don't make us pick!
The first rule of Fight Club is... #BadPreFlightInstructions
In case of an emergency your seats may be used as a toilet
#BadPreFlightInstructions
#BadPreFlightInstructions Attention Passengers! Would you like to lose unwanted belly fat?
If you begin to feel air sick, stick your head out of the window. #BadPreFlightInstructions
#BadPreFlightInstructions Attention Passengers! Please start a boring conversation w the stranger next to you pretending to be reading.
#BadPreFlightInstructions It's pure survival of the fittest. Don't let anybody get in your way if we have to use the emergency exits
#BadPreFlightInstructions Thank you for waiting as our flight attendants apply Calamine lotion to their rashes from the new uniforms.

#BadPreFlightInstructions
In case of overbooking monitory incentives will be offered. Failing that, people will be randomly shot π¨ββοΈ
#BadPreFlightInstructions Attention! All auto mechanics on board, please report to the front.
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