Top Tweets for #BrainTypos
Time for #BrainTypos, when we post our best/worst misreadings! My recents:
•caused by viruses, fungi and meditations
•junior & medieval employees
•purgatory agencies
•paint color: baloney sunset
•auto-soup
•ham & negligence
•hot dog atelier
•pumpkin pie minestrone
Time for #BrainTypos, my best/worst misreadings from last week!
•crushed by the ruling cats
•declassified donuts
•Hell House nap dress
•Minefield Seinfeld
•she was born postpartum
•Scientists can’t decide if red pandas are related to giant pandas, skunks, or walnuts.
I keep a list of my best/worst misreadings and call them #braintypos. This week’s roundup:
•Don’t let anyone pressure-wash your chicken
•He was the first human American to fill this position
•Disney-ABC Domestic Terrorism
•Are you ready to update your wardrobe, weirdo?
Last week’s misreadings, aka #BrainTypos
•new Bigfoot headphones
•clogged cream
•The Cure of Strahd
•defeat the Spanish Amanda
•Teen Judge
•illegal racehorse harvesting
•a chihuahua named The Pope
•now screaming on Hulu
•best way to develop ADHD
•nonfungible toxin
This week’s #braintypos:
- officers have shot down traffic
- Little Drunks Bay Lookout
- Ferret Tuesday
- furniture is pooping out of the walls
Some recent #braintypos, aka stuff I THOUGHT I read, include:
•how to befriend your enemies and turn them into crows
•the Flammable Fascists Act
•anyone know of hiding places in Buffalo?
•I wear earbuds at work to listen to music and curse the old gods
SO GLAD I’m not alone in this. #BrainTypos
Every time someone tweets something about libertarians I read it as librarians and I get confused for like 20 seconds
Also thought I read in Robert Peary’s North Pole memoir that “a beautiful white FOG came to the ship and attempted to get on board”
and when I reread it, I again misread it as “a beautiful white FROG.”
Turns out it was a white fox. And that I had a fever. #braintypos
This week in #braintypos, I misread real phrases as:
•aquatic ferret
•what brand is this dog
•about to get a PokéBall for lunch
•This is a nation where you’re free to be a Christian. Or Muslim. Or Hindu. Or Atheist. Or Hot.
•the prince of insulin
•decolonize your cat
What do you do if you’re #copyediting but can’t, uh, read? You record your best #braintypos & share them! This week’s misreadings produced:
•Lake Comeuppance
•circus clouds
•lobster roll fight
•bare minimum breakroom
•the Federal Trade Commission resplendent
Time for #braintypos, in which I post my weekly misreadings with zero context. Which speaks to you?
•the DOJ’s new intergalactic task force
•extreme soup!
•ancient organs
•I dried the flowers my husband wore in his butthole when we were married
•self-satisfied juice
Your weekly #BrainTypos, aka things I misread, include:
•submarine architecture
•your sad idiot aunt
•“The shitposter John Isaac Thornycroft patented an early design for an air cushion ship / hovercraft in the 1870s”
•listed in “Who’s Afraid of American Women, 1997-1998”
My weekly list of #braintypos, aka things I wildly misread! Do I remember what any of these originally were? Never.
•celebrate your department’s quarterly whims
•Sweet. Angry. Juicy.
•ADHD Texas
•the universality of Michigan
•carpet lawyer
Now for #BrainTypos, aka things I misread last week! Do I remember what they originally were? Good sir, I do not.
•D&D Starbucks
•Revolting credit facility
•Diurnal board of directors
•Guest horse
•Artichoke choked chicken
•Hand weaponizer
•Tactical tortoise
Also featured statutes v. statues, my old nemesis.
A statue of repose sounds nice! A statue of limitations sounds… hmm, allegorical, but not appealing? #braintypos #amediting
Mondays we post our best #braintypos. What I THOUGHT I read last week:
•restaurant of torts
•“It’s been one year and thousands of bees since we opened”
•segregation is umbilical
•Sir Ernest Henry Shackleton CVO OBE FROGS
•declining stork prices
•the baby likes maggots
#BrainTypos: Just misread "nature writers whose descriptions are personal meditations" as "nature writers whose descriptions are personal MELTDOWNS"
and damn, girl, mood
#BrainTypos: Just misread the bio for Priscilla Wilson's memoir GOURD GIRLS (which looks charming!) as "She worked for the Atlanta Council Camp of FERAL Girls"
And I was like, "yes, I have worked at a sleepaway camp; this lady GETS it." @clandyjane
#BrainTypos: Just misread a line in an upcoming book as "Millions of POEMS arrived in Florida during the time frame 2000–2010."
That's a lovely thought.
Misread a job description as "uses WORDS OF POWER, graphics, and social media to promote [our company]" today
And until I realized it was actually "power of words," I was 100% like "this company wants to hire a wizard from Earthsea as a marketing assistant, dang." #BrainTypos
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