Top Tweets for #MarriedManProblems
When the wife forbids you from trimming your goatee in the sink because of the mess it makes. You have to be creative. So I did it outside on the lawn. Jack was telling me if I missed a spot. Lol. #truestory #marriedmanproblems

Easy to convince parents, friends, co-workers and relatives to move away from Facebook, Instagram and Whatsapp but not my wife!
Absolutely zero care for privacy.
#marriedmanproblems
When your wife tells you to help mow the lawn but you fail to accomplish your task without her aid, you get sent to the corner and have to ponder your mistakes. Lol. #marriedmanproblems #ReadyToGoBackToWork

We were going to have food delivered & enjoy a meal together. We couldn't agree so we ordered from TWO different places. One for her & one for me. These things happen. Question is how did I end up paying for both? Wife must have "Jedi Mind Tricked" me. Lol. #marriedmanproblems

My wife keeps talking about Louis Vuitton purses and all I talk about is wanting more velcro for my wallet. My wife keeps talking about Steve Madden shoes and all I want is more velcro for my footwear. #marriedmanproblems #VelcroForLife Lol.

My wife carries a large purse. I asked "what items in there will you not use?" She said her wallet first. So I stopped her mid sentence & said, "So you're not even going to offer to pay for anything while we are out?" She said, "You catch on quick sucka." #marriedmanproblems lol.
@WBrettWilson If I pretend to be a parody account can we have a discussion where you buy me a new driver because my wife won’t! Btw you are the man. #marriedmanproblems
If you don’t say nothing you can’t say anything wrong. #marriedmanproblems
@reddevilniku Happy Wedding Anniversary @reddevilniku! Hope she loves football #MarriedManProblems😁😁
#Clean #sheets and all, a fella could get used to a freshly made bed AND his half of the covers. #MarriedManProblems
@DFreeDBZHD You love them Insane chicks too huh? We something else bruh! 😂😂 #CrazyIsTheBest #TheyWinning #MarriedManProblems
Its a bit rich, Facebook asking me what's on my mind. I don't know, the wife hasn't told me what I am thinking yet. #MarriedManProblems
Lost:2 1/2 hours of my life. Location:Vue cinema. If found please return along with my manhood. #marriedmanproblems
Before I got married. I didn't know there was a right and a wrong way to fold towels. There is btw. #marriedmanproblems
My wife " don't you get bored watching football all day" smh #marriedmanproblems
Listening to your wife giggle at ridiculous Instagram posts. #MarriedManProblems
No, my wedding ring is not lost. I vividly recall placing in secure location, I just can't recall said location #marriedmanproblems
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