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It had been 10 days, but I finally got out of the house on Sunday. The grass was high, and it needed to be mowed. My plan was to do the back only. Susan used to tell me not to overdo it; I could finish the following day. I never listened, and I usually did the entire lawn. Before I went out, I talked to Susan, telling her that I’m physically and emotionally drained, and I’d only do the back. I knew that’s what she’d want to hear. Because of all the rain, the grass was too high to mulch, so I bagged it, which makes it harder. I finished the back and went in to eat something and hydrate. I told Susan I may go out and do the play yard after lunch, but that would depend on how I felt. I went back out and did the play yard, the front side, and the front. When I came in, I was sweaty and exhausted, and I apologized to Susan for doing the entire yard. I knew she’d be pissed. I'll be 69 in less than a month. Usually, when I was done and the mower put away, she'd tell me to have a Gatorade and hydrate. Then she’d look out of the sunroom at the backyard, and then the front box bay window in the living room to see the front yard. The lines were always straight, and she'd tell me I did a great job. But this time, no one was there to make me hydrate or tell me how good the yard looked. It hit me like a ton of bricks... I sat at my computer in the kitchen looking at my favorite pic of her, and after wiping the tears from my eyes, I realized how much I love and miss her. It took me an hour to get myself a drink…