Top Tweets for #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
#SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
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I was arrested and charged with drunk driving the night before my vasectomy. Still hungover and feeling mighty stupid, as the surgeon standing above me, armed with a giant syringe said “this will sting a bit” I said “go ahead, I deserve it” #vssmed
#SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
1/2
While in twilight, prepped for vasectomy I laid there wearing only a flimsy dressing gown open in front. A short line of curious ‘nurses’ came by, each had a peek and a comment. Didn’t mind the admiration, but the giggles bothered a bit #vssmed
#SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
Surgeon: No need to be nervous, we're just like anyone else.
Me: I don't want anyone else, I want someone who knows what they're doing!
*true story*
Numb & number #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
Ok folks I'll be back Friday! Tip your waitress & try the veal! #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
#SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia please tell me I'm a good Ghostbuster
It wasn't the one-armed man, it was me. #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
Baby, if I die, don't have a funeral for me. Just bury me in the backyard and tell everyone I left you. #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
"Can you put your fingers in my mouth?", said my friend after her back surgery #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
#Poll What do u do at 9pm when you choices are @megynkelly #CNN or MSNBC? #ScreamQueens #NewGirl #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia #KellyFile #Maga
#SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
damn!
I think I'm in love
with that morphine drip,
but don't tell her I cheated on
her with the fentymal patches!
#SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
Look Out--Duck--that plane is flying at the same altitude as I am
#SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
At my first colonoscapy.
"I hope you know this qualifies as our first date."
I spilled the beans on a long held family secret, I didn't know I knew afterwards. #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
"Excuse me nurse, is there a more button for this IV" ? #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia #funny #hospital
https://t.co/zAe6h15JUR
"HahahahahaHAAAAAAHAAAAAAHAAAA... You loohoohoook ridICULOUS! HAAAAhahahaha" etc to the kindly surgical team. #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia
Nurse: do you know where you are?
Me: I've won the house cup. I'm shaking hands with Dumbledore #SaidWhileUnderAnesthesia #TrueStory
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