al

mentally rotating a couch

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a scared little kid unable to fall asleep sees a tree branch waving in his window. he rubs his eyes and sees a monster arm, and sighs in relief. tell me that shouldn't be in a Korn music video, man

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Chewbacca is making those noises again

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People are making all kinds of wacky statements today

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Muting the tv when ads are playing feels so good

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You clockin’ my tea?

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Also Dustin Hoffman is 87 years old

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It’s kind of interesting how “Dustin” is a very puka shell coded name to me even though perhaps the world’s most famous Dustin is Hoffman (not puka shell coded)

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Putting the title song at the end of an album is always a classy move I think

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Clairo gives me Young Sheldon vibes

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[Baseball manager picks up dugout phone] Hey mom can you pick me up

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[To the tune of Paradise City (bad song)] Take me down to the Roku City where the buildings are purple and the people are purple

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I find the ad where Larry Bird gets hurt to be rather upsetting

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If I suddenly found myself stuck centuries in the past from a time travel glitch and had to make a medieval king a sandwich I’d definitely opt for a nice Brioche bun. He’d probably deem the soft texture “most perfectly agreeable” or something along those lines

[furby hancock @furby_hancock]

me: how about this one? neutral players. they can score for either team and you have to win them over.

lebron james: (early stages of stockholm syndrome) that's good, that's a good one. i actually suggested that one time

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Just thought about 5 dollars

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The 80s really “left no crumbs” when it comes to Halloween music

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Seeing that the local AQI has officially entered “good” territory and frolicking around in my front lawn like I’m Julie Andrews

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Just brought someone good tidings

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A second spin-off movie for Puss-in-Boots before giving Donkey one spin-off seems pretty fucking ridiculous to me but whatever