Elizabeth Hoepner

Don't make me sing.

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

@_allie_d_ Thank you! Happy Birthday to you too!! ☺️

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

@_allie_d_ 💀😂 I just bought an eye cream a couple weeks ago.

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

@_allie_d_ Yes! Only every time I listen to it. 😅

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

Welp. That was Jesus.

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

@Courtney_Cip Can you change that to 40+ year olds? I’m taking offense lol.

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

Trying to determine if the boys upstairs are stomping around because they’re mad about my music or they started a step team 🤔

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

I’m too fucked up for this...

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

Romo practically calling every play is my favorite.

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

The last 3 minutes of this game have been so fucking suspenseful.

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

So that Bachelor babies segment was super cute until Arie showed up. #seriouslyfuckthatguy #TheBachelor

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

@Tononim28 Ahh procrastination... you cruel mistress

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

I drive home in less than three days. I haven’t wrapped a single present and still have to pack. But I’m definitely gonna keep laying on this couch though. 🤷‍♀️

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

So people here are VERY adamant on saying Merry Christmas.

Me: Thanks for shopping with us today. Have a nice holiday!
Every Customer (with a certain tone): Merry Christmas to you too!

Ohh ok, well shit.

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

#wcw😍 https://t.co/t6bTIKw2UU

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

I don’t like when the boys upstairs have girls over. Specifically girls who wear heels.

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

I always tear up when Gordon makes Banks sit because his wrist is a liability. #stillacakeeaterthough

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

This must be why the boys upstairs randomly started screaming.... 🙄 cool #idonthaveatvyet #implayingsolitareinbed #livingmybestlife

[Detroit Red Wings @DetroitRedWings]

#REDWINGS WIN!!!!

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

“I wanna do at least two shots.”

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

I’m the only woman that works here and yet I’m the one outside on the ladder spraying down the millions spiders with insecticide. It makes me think, why is the expression not “dropping like spiders” ???

[Elizabeth Hoepner @hoepner_b]

I definitely came home to pack and did everything but 🙄 I’m so bad at adulting.