in a parasocial feud with judd apatow

pop-pop gets a treat?

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

was gonna submit my shark movie to a screenplay contest but then i saw the production budget for the winning script was only $250,000...oh we’re gonna need more than that for shark effects and robert pattinson luv

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

im not even religious anymore but i really can’t stand people misreading the bible like do some thinking! you spend all that time in church and don’t even come away with a single critical thought!

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

of course, it’s a protestant lying about the bible. catholics—i stand with you. christians have sullied your name for too long with their false beliefs. it literally makes me want to go to church and consume the eucharist when i see blasphemous christian nonsense.

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

just a girl desiring her seasonal treats (pillsbury halloween sugar cookies) and unable to find them bc The Man (canada) wants to restrict my freedom

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

there’s just something so beautiful about a clothing store entirely designed to look like santa’s workshop with gaudy sweaters and cute socks and Christmas music is playing all day and it’s busy enough that im not bored

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

i miss working in retail during the holidays like im sorry but im a sucker for kitsch and discounts and gifts and decorations and themes

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

mind you this is just the holiday season i would never work on the actual holiday

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

if you’re still talking about “girl math” and “men think about the roman empire” like any of it matters you’re a raving lunatic

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

massive flaw in Patrick Bateman’s skincare routine: he uses way too many exfoliating products

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

i think men reach peak beauty in their 40s

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

anyway the internet has scared millennials into believing that can’t write anything that isn’t eternally self-referential, always trying to get ahead of the narrative that may follow an “edgy” joke, which renders all the humour without bite or conviction

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

seasons 13+ of it’s always sunny is a tragic tale of writers succumbing to modernity, as the aging actors struggle to stay relevant and cool, they erroneously paint their characters with the same uwu brush their fans do, and any attempt at rekindling their former glory is hollow

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

not to mention the sudden care for the characters themselves, like why is Charlie having an earnest emotional plea to his dead father on a mountainside in Ireland? this is 15 seasons too late, and a strange deviation in tone for something so banal in the long run

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

@dorysief people are really just sending their anger over something so trivial into my junk mail. like okay! hope that made you feel better?

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

i just think it’s crazy to comment on a letterboxd review that is more than a few months old like some people are writing essays of condemnation on reviews from a decade ago. who do you think cares? certainly not the person who made the original post!

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

i may still be unable to cook chicken but I have made my own pumpkin coffee cream and delectable tofu ramen in the last 24 hours

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

every time i open this app the algorithm exclusively shows me age gap discourse and red scare (both sides of the spectrum) no wonder the internet isn’t fun for me anymore

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

they’re playing milkshake at the military gym .. I feel like I’m in top gun

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

they’re playing the pussy cat dolls at the military gym

[in a parasocial feud with judd apatow @hotdad23]

logging on for the first time this century to say oppenheimer? more like floppenheimer. total snooze