Chad Hubich

Dad, husband, grandfather, retired, nice guy.

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@davepl1968 “The largest supplier of truck mounted cranes in the Williston basin area”

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@davepl1968 @adammocklerr I remember this song/album. Met the members of Toronto at the Sears store on Broad Street.

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@k1rallik Negligible sadly

[Polymarket @Polymarket]

NEW: Reports of "grapefruit-sized hail" are coming out of North Texas amid severe storms.

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@ctvregina It's big!

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@TVDadsdotcom @mistressdivy Now I see the “Many Faces of Death” on X, everyday.

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@BradWall306 @PierrePoilievre @Brad tell us that story again about being the ministerial assistant to John Gerich in your early career. @Grok, what happened to John?

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

My CISO called me at 3 AM last Tuesday.

"We caught someone."

I asked, "Caught them doing what?"

He said, "Typing."

Let me explain.

We have an employee in IT. Great worker. Always online. Never complained. Perfect Slack etiquette.

One problem.

His keystrokes were arriving 110 milliseconds late.

One hundred and ten milliseconds.

That's 0.11 seconds.

The average American remote worker has 20-40ms of latency.

This guy? 110ms. Every. Single. Keystroke.

My security team ran the numbers.

That latency doesn't come from a bad router in Ohio.

That latency comes from Pyongyang.

Our "Senior DevOps Engineer" was a North Korean operative.

Running his work laptop through a laptop farm.

In America.

While he worked from a government building.

In North Korea.

He passed the interview. He passed the background check. He passed the vibe check.

He did not pass the speed of light.

Here's what people don't understand about physics:

Light travels 186,000 miles per second.

But it still has to go through China.

And China adds latency.

Since April, Amazon has caught 1,800 of these attempts.

Eighteen hundred.

I called an emergency meeting with my board.

I said, "We need to implement Keystroke Velocity Auditing across all remote employees."

They said, "That sounds invasive."

I said, "You know what else is invasive? The Democratic People's Republic of Korea in your Jira tickets."

They approved the budget.

We now monitor keystroke timing to the microsecond.

If your latency exceeds 60ms, you get a call from HR.

If it exceeds 100ms, you get a call from the FBI.

We've already flagged 47 employees.

Turns out 44 of them just have bad Wi-Fi.

3 of them are "still under investigation."

The lesson?

You can fake a resume.

You can fake a background check.

You can fake an American accent on Zoom.

But you cannot fake the speed of light.

Physics is the ultimate background check.

Hire accordingly.

[MI-TAC Actual @MITACLLC]

Earthquake in the Drake Passage looks like it’s been downgraded.

[SpaceWeatherNews @SunWeatherMan]

🚨Huge quake- M8 strikes the drake passage near Antarctica

This happened moments ago

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@meme99369 As a resident of Saskatchewan, it was arson

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@yegwave WHole-e-Schmitt

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@GlobalRegina Great coverage of Sandra Masters.

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@GlobalRegina You do have Internet at Global Regina, right?

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@disclosetv Busily deleting every truth.

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@kmcnam1 An Ethernet network cable has 8 wires and the blue and white/blue wires (pins 4 and 5) are used for the positive voltage (V+) and the negative voltage (V-) uses white/brown and brown wires (pins 7 & 8 on the RJ45 plug).

This power?

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@therealballsy @sskroughriders But the merch revenue.

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@elonmusk With or without closed caption subtitles for the hearing impaired?

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@Grain_Canada Locations near Lajord and Avonlea.

[Chad Hubich @hubich]

@sskroughriders I watched this game.