Satire

[Satire @HuumbleSatire]

@NigeriaMFA Hypocrite..

[Idris @7signxx]

You are not directly responsible for the people of Saudi Arabia. Here are some of the people you are directly responsible for. Please, for the sake of the little baby involved, we beg you to kindly do something about this as soon as possible...

[Parallel Facts @ParallelFacts]

INEC Disregards Electoral Act, Refuses To Disclose Voters' Register, Hides Total Number Of Registered Voters a Move Critics Described As Ploy To Cook Fake Numbers In 2027 https://t.co/z4qI5pxQr4

[Abdul-Aziz Na'ibi Abubakar @jrnaib2]

My brother Bashir, didn’t you see the disturbing video of a man from Kaduna kidnapped alongside his wife and their 3-month-old baby, with terrorists demanding a ₦300 million ransom?

This is happening in your country and your region. Channel this energy into condemning the crisis and demanding that Bola Tinubu’s government end the insecurity at your doorstep, instead of focusing only on the war between Saudi Arabia and the Houthis while your home faces a greater threat.

[👑S.A.L.A.K.O🕊 @UnkleAyo]

That stupid Minister @realdaveumahi tried to belittle this reporter who, in good judgment, asked him if he has conducted EIA ~ Environmental Impact Assessment.

He played it as a joke.

One year after, they're scattering everything to start afresh.

A useless government.

[Ette Okon👴🏾 @ThinktwiceDark1]

EKEDC just put a 181k bill on my meter saying that I was on band A and they were billing me for band B, so they back charged to recover their “lost income”.

No explanation about how the figure came about. It’s either I pay up or I can’t buy more power.

Same for everybody in my estate. Same for a lot of other households. @EKEDP the judge, jury and executioner. We went to see the operations manager today and he literally told us to gth out of his office and do our worst.

This is the country we live in now.

[Alhaji Ògògó @akintonmide]

He is not a public official. He is just the President's son but somehow he has become an authority.

This country has gotta work so we rid ourselves of patterns like this

[CHUKS 🍥 @ChuksEricE]

NAFDAC today Uncovers Suspected Counterfeit Production Facility in Lagos, Arrests Two Suspects

NAFDAC has uncovered a suspected counterfeit production facility at Zamfara Plaza, BBA Trade Fair Complex, Lagos State.

Two suspects were arrested at the scene while allegedly revalidating energy drinks and popular wine, bullet drink and whisky brands

[oseni rufai @ruffydfire]

*Coastal Road: Dave Umahi is Living in Bondage*
Dr Ugo Egbujo.

Someday a tribunal will sit on the coastal road project

Nothing can be hidden under the sun

A president awarded a multi trillon naira project to his business partner

The project had barely started

When they suddenly discovered there were telecom lines on the route

A multi trillion naira project

No surveys

No tender. No bidding . No costing

And the minister wouldnt answer any questions

The minister had said the contractor would source all the money

Then he changed and said the country would contribute 15-30%

He wasnt even sure of the exact percentage contribution

Then suddenly the FG threw over a trillion into the project

When a yound lady dared to ask if there was an environmental impact assessment

Umahi mocked her

Two weeks later Umahi said they didnt know there were telecom lines on their path

Rufai Oseni asked what the cost per kilometer was

Umahi dismissed the legitimate question as illiterate

A few days later Unahi announced that he scope of the project had been reduced

It was no longer a total of 10 lanes .

It would now be six lanes. Just like that

The entire thing was arbitrary , haphazard, shifty

When Obi said the road was a wrong priority for a country whose existing roads were crumbling

Saying the road would require 30 years for completion

Tinubu and his men scoffed at him

When Amaechi said he would stop the road and fix the East West road first

They mocked him

Now Umahi has childishly confessed that the day Tinubu approved the re routing of the road to the East West road was the best day of his life

Guy must have be living a miserable life

A few days ago he had told us that he chose the project and chose the contractor without any prompting from Tinubu

He wanted to fool us into believing that Tinubu didnt award the contrat to his business partner

If the best day of his life is now the day Tinubu agreed to a partial discontinuation of the coastal road

Then Umahi has been living in bondage all the while

But the joke is on the clown

Because

Almost the entire country knew that Tinubu was only interested in the lagos Ogun corridor

And he wasn't going to complete no coastal road 🤣😢

[NEFERTITI @firstladyship]

He destroyed Landmark & people’s lives & businesses just to open up a coastal road that leads to his personal real estate development with Gilbert Chagoury. A very wicked soul.

[OurFaveOnlineDoc 🇬🇧 🇳🇬 @OurFavOnlineDoc]

“We didn't fight for this rickety democracy. That somebody will look at your face and say, oh, you should not vote.”

Human rights lawyer Femi Falana says Nigerians deserve answers on the LagosCalabar Coastal Highway’s ₦15 trillion cost and route changes. https://t.co/gEpf7OrJEJ

[Oyindamola🙄 @dammiedammie35]

Nigerian man in shock after discovering 46 out of 120 buckets of paint he bought were filled with water💔💔💔

[Felix @felixherbt]

Nigerians, pay attention.

INEC has refused to disclose the voters' register, hiding the total number of registered voters to cook fake numbers.

Section 19(1) of the Electoral Act 2026 requires the voters’ register to be displayed at every registration area and online.

Why is INEC not obeying its own rules? Why is the voters' register not displayed on the INEC website? @inecnigeria

[Obiasogu David @afrisagacity]

I have just received sad news.💔

The landlord of the building where the NDC has an office in Alimosho, Lagos State has directed the NDC Chairman in the LGA to pull down the ONLY party banner hung in front of the office.

According to the NDC officials in the LGA, some men, who identified as APC officials, threatened the Landlady that she risked the building being demolished, if she refused to take down the banner by tomorrow, Tuesday.

The landlord had sent the building’s Caretaker, an elderly woman, earlier today to bring down the banner. Fortunately, the NDC officials were having a meeting in the office at the time she arrived. They jointly resisted her move, insisting that the banner would stay up.

After several minutes of prolonged chaos and tiresome back-and-forth, the woman soft-pedaled and resorted to pleading with them. It was then that she revealed the Landlord had received threats of demolition if the banner stayed up.

The NDC officials pointed out that banners belonging to other people were also hung across the building and the owners were not being threatened to pull them down.

They insisted that they'd not remove the banner. The Caretaker left angrily, but not without repeating her threat that the banner must go down by tomorrow. As I type, the situation remains the same.✍️

@PeterObi @KwankwasoRM @iamHSDickson @Drmopaul @AishaYesufu

[OurFaveOnlineDoc 🇬🇧 🇳🇬 @OurFavOnlineDoc]

This is the same building the American real estate expert reviewed.

The very same building.

Here is Ola of Lagos’s review of that house. Zero useful information. Zero sensible analysis. Just a lot of noise, useless hype and sprinkles of “I no fit poor”

[Satire @HuumbleSatire]

@Victorokeke_ He's focusing on critical infrastructure. The boring things. Not white elephant projects like coastal road and so on.

[Ugonna Okeke @Victorokeke_]

Governor Alex Otti is not highly admired by civil servants in Abia State, as they claim he is constantly auditing every ministry and agency. He runs the state's bureaucracy like a business, to the anger of those who see government jobs as a source of free money. He withholds salary for every default.

But others praise him for conducting the most transparent employment exercises; my friend received an offer from Abia State University and his first salary—which he said was even higher than what was stated in his employment letter—without paying anyone or knowing anyone. I have met and know many people who secured teaching jobs in primary and secondary schools without paying bribes, which was the norm previously.

The physical aesthetics of Aba have not improved much, but the roads are way better and the environment is cleaner. The brash brushing culture still remains; people run in front of Keke Napep. There are no marked pedestrian crossings.

There is this calm. The generator noise has almost disappeared from all the clothing-making areas in Kent, York, Tennant, Cameron, Azikiwe or Pounds Road; even St. Michael's is quiet now.

There is a predictable pattern in electricity supply; even when the supply is interrupted, people wait patiently for it to return because it is going to be restored. It has been raining for an hour now and is continuing as I type this, but we have power.

Lastly, I think he is investing in more citizen-centered infrastructure [the schools with running water, the hospitals with electricity and consumables, the developments outside the urban areas] rather than "legacy projects." The results of these will be evident in years to come, not immediately.

[Satire @HuumbleSatire]

@idofoi @FriendsOfBAT @OgbeniDipo @aonanuga1956 @officialABAT If anybody in this comment section know say him papa or mama sabi curse person, challenge them to curse Tinubu, wife and pikin.

[Satire @HuumbleSatire]

@idofoi @FriendsOfBAT @OgbeniDipo @aonanuga1956 @officialABAT Challenge your father to resign! You twat

[Àkànní @idofoi]

"...My father, President Bola Ahmed Tinubu, is a man of legacy, and he has endured this in his political career. I challenge today all the youths in this room to go forward and remember where we came from, and go forward and demand to be given a chance. Go forward and demand to be in the room..." - Seyi Tinubu, Convener, Seyi Tinubu Colloquium