ispeakfunny™

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Giving you funny swagged out quotes on the regs. RT If you agree!
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[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

RT this if you've made a little kid cry, but then made them laugh so you wouldn't get in trouble.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

When you spill something you can never clean it up with one paper towel like in the commercials, right?

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

@ComedyPosts: That FML moment when your Capri Sun doesn't want to lose its virginity.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

#BiggestLiesGirlsSay No! Stop!

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

Really dope shirts. Check out @GINORMOUSBRAND #swag

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

If I was a rapper, my name would be 2 Chins.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

Sunday funday!

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

The awkward moment when you pretend die in front of your pet...and they don't move.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

Sometimes it's hard for me to tell if I have sex daily, or dyslexia.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

I'm not fat. I'm just so sexy that it overflows. ;)

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

When people come over, and your mom suddenly becomes the nicest woman in the world...

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

Going to the bathroom at school strictly because you're bored in class.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

@_Pawll I'm back at it!

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

The only way 2 bullshit a bullshitter is if the bullshitter thats bullshitting the bullshitter is a better bullshitter than the bullshitter.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

Some people are like honey badgers, they just don't give a shit.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

Whoever broke Adele's heart made her rich as hell!

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

You hate it when someone hands you their cellphone claiming it's your dad, when CLEARLY it's a cellphone.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

You know it's cold outside when you go outside and it's cold.

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

When an officer says, "How high are you?" the proper response is, "No, officer. It's hi, how are you?"

[ispeakfunny™ @ispeakfunny]

"I'm not like most girls." - most girls