Itzy

26

[riri @glimpsesofriri]

“I’d take a bullet for my wife” how about you take out the trash ngga

[Raksha @caraksha103]

Nobody is glowing like the coworker who is about to quit

[Amelia @amelia_tweetz]

I’ve reached the age where I only get one main event a day. Doctor’s appointment? Hair appointment? One stressful work call? That’s it. Everything else gets pushed to tomorrow.

[azurwoofwoof @azurwoofwoof]

what doesnt kill you turns into memory loss, panic attacks, gut issues and hand tremors

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

i really love the phrase 'with all due respect' because it doesn't specify how much respect is due. could be none.

[𝓚𝓻𝓲𝓼 ✦ @Kristosavage2]

One day I will solve my problems with maturity.
But today it will be marijuana

[thanyx @Thanyely_r]

sanando y colapsando pq soy multitasking

[Daisy @DaizyZeeX]

Maybe i am too woke 🤷🏻‍♀️ but I'm actually glad birth rates are declining. Not because children are a burden, but because more people are finally realising they're not fit to be parents and that's a far kinder decision than bringing a child into a life they're not prepared for.

[Ari🪷 @arikoyarii]

it is absolutely essential to have friends you can have extremely insane pervert conversations with. this is kind of what makes life worth living

[𝓚𝓻𝓲𝓼 ✦ @Kristosavage2]

Edibles kick in after they hear you talking shit about them

[roxy demento @falseroxy]

it's so interesting to meet people who were traumatized by their parents' divorce because i personally was traumatized by my parents' marriage

[ana @anahldz]

de qué sustancia tengo que abusar para poder aceptar que lo que extraño ya no existe

[cee @1ovesickkk]

big fan of anything that stops the voices in my head for a while

[Rafael D @ratael]

el termino mascota me parece algo despectivo para referirse a los seres que considero mis asesores espirituales

[Ross @rosaa_yo]

Primero runners, después fue CrossFit, luego que pinchi pádel y ahora todos hyrox, nambreeee

[Lutaaya @JoshuaLutaaya__]

Never underestimate the ability of ice cream to make you feel better when you’re having a bad day as an adult

[Vellicora @Vellicora]

“you handled that so well” genuinely wtf was the other option

[love(r) @lovescritos]

por favor, vayan al psicólogo y dejen de lastimar a personas por tener asuntos pendientes con ustedes mismos. Gracias