Jack

Jose Ramirez will be the GOAT fight me about it. ***Bury me with a 6 pack of rolling rock and a bottle of Jameson*** always see the kindness in others*

[The Wonton Don @DonnieDoesWorld]

King of the jungle

[Jack @jPolo13]

@NFL_DovKleiman Why are we giving one of many long draft busts press at this point? Dude minds well be DeShone Kizer

[Jack @jPolo13]

@barstoolchicago Did they win the game or did they quit?

[Echoes of War @EchoesofWarYT]

George Washington bred his own pack of hunting dogs and named them like a man with zero supervision. We're talking Sweet Lips, Tipsy, Tipler, Drunkard, and one named Vulcan who was so big a kid could ride him like a pony. Vulcan once stole an entire ham straight off the dinner table and bolted to the kennels. The General just laughed while Martha sat there furious.

But the dogs were only half of it. The man could DANCE. In 1779 he partnered with Kitty Greene at a ball and the two of them danced for over three hours straight without sitting down once. People at the time said he was actually elite at it. He called it "so agreeable and innocent an amusement."

And in his final years his big retirement hobby was building a whiskey distillery. Not a little hobby still either. By 1799 it was the largest distillery in America, cranking out 11,000 gallons a year.

So the real George Washington: breeds hunting dogs with names like Drunkard, dances for three hours straight, runs the biggest whiskey operation in the country. Founding Father behavior.

[Barstool Sports @barstoolsports]

This is his villain origin story

[Tom Fornelli @TomFornelli]

Not even sure C,D,E,F or G need to be in the graphic tbh.

[Christopher Hale @ChristopherHale]

John Prevost, the pope’s older brother, rang from Chicago with a computer problem — because Bob, as the family still calls him, has always been the one who fixes these things.

“John, I’m the pope,” Leo reminded him.

The reply came without a pause: “Oh, sorry pope. My computer is broken.” https://t.co/55sS6rz4vg

[SleeperMLB @SleeperMLB]

José Ramírez has flat out been one of the best players in MLB since 2021

His stats and where they rank:
892 hits (6th)
168 HR (t-8th)
545 RBI (6th)
184 SB (1st)
32.0 fWAR (4th)

12% K rate (t-10th)
0.85 BB/K rate (6th)

Get well soon, king

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[Baseball’s Greatest Moments @BBGreatMoments]

Give that dog a Gold Glove immediately 😂

[CLEology @_CLEology]

The Cade Crusader ™️ #GuardsBall

[Zack Meisel @ZackMeisel]

José Ramírez's 50th helmet loss of the season, by date:

2016: Sept. 20
2017: none
2018: none
2019: none
2020: none
2021: Aug. 8
2022: July 5
2023: Aug. 24
2024: July 28
2025: July 5
*2026: June 6*

(He's now at 51)

[Zack Meisel @ZackMeisel]

José Ramírez 2026 Helmet Counter™️: 50

This is the earliest he has reached 50, by nearly an entire month.

[Jack @jPolo13]

@TBob53 That snowman on all drugs needs to be purchased

[Jack @jPolo13]

@StevenCheah I think my 81-1 team beats the 82-0 team

[MLB @MLB]

José Ramírez was daring José Caballero to try to throw him out at first base 😭

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

@Kenn321705 I’ve never stolen an erection in my life.

[Jose @GuardsBurner_]

Tom Hamilton on Jazz Chisholm:

“He predicted the Yankees will win the World Series. He did that on the Jimmy Fallon show. Pretty amazing he got on the Jimmy Fallon show batting .239.”