jmorelli

[jmorelli @j_morelli33]

I need a nap

[Kyle 🌱 @KylePlantEmoji]

The difference between bicycle clothes and tricycle clothes is a matter of attire

[Andrew Yang🧢⬆️🇺🇸 @AndrewYang]

It’s not left vs right, it’s the people vs. a system designed to turn us against each other.

[Right Wing Cope @RightWingCope]

Pretty confident that’s ketchup and BBQ sauce

[Charlotte. @charlotteirene8]

"No one is pro-abortion." Stop saying that. I'm pro-abortion. There's nothing wrong with being pro-abortion because abortions help people. Saying "No one is pro-abortion" adds to the stigma against abortions and makes things harder for the people who get them.

[Rajat Suresh @rajat_suresh]

There is no baby on board. Feel free to crash into this car 👍

[inds @india_barton]

HERE’S JOHNNY!!!
62 hours, the biggest drawing I’ve ever done 🤘🏼🖤

[Chase @notchaselyons]

My dentist said I grind in my sleep damn he’s real for that 💯

[Wilde Thingy @wildethingy]

I'm experimenting with how many apples I need to eat a day to keep EVERYONE away, whatever their profession.

[Racism Watchdog @RacismDog]

BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

[Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti]

I know four people who are going to be very happy.

[Dylan Palacio @greentoepalacio]

This Is Attempted Murder.

[hugo @toasteredbread]

every mental health professional i've ever talked to has been like "you have a lot of self awareness" and i'm like yes i actually think that is part of the problem

[Great Value Beyoncé @tieshatwo]

Do not ever donate money at a store checkout. They’ve already paid the donation for the tax write off. They’re collecting their refund from you.

[Tony Hawk @tonyhawk]

at a Covid testing site (wearing masks), handing over paperwork for me & two of my kids:
woman looking over papers: "okay... Anthony, Keegan and Kadence... Hawk? Are you guys related to Tony Hawk?"
me: yes
her: "Are you pulling my leg?"
me: no, we are all directly related to him

[Racks @FraudActivity_]

NY niggas don’t even say they leaving, they stretch and say “aight bro"

[andrew @AndrewsNotFunny]

y=mx+b jokes are great but at some point we'll have to draw the line