lady of the swamp

she/her

[love @Funabynature]

Applying for visas is so humiliating mahn. It’s giving ‘white man please let me into your country. I promise to be of good behavior and I’ll leave when I said I’ll leave. Here’s all my life’s worth and evidence that I have something doing. Plis just let me in’. So embarrassing 😭

[Dan Carney @DanManCarney]

There’s a period in your life where you smoke cigarettes without remorse and it’s the happiest you’ll ever be

[Blair @Blxir]

Got a £3.30 too good to go bag from Aldi. I could not have expected this 😂🤣

[Charlie James @malecowgirl]

guys we as a species need to focus all our efforts on making a cigarette that’s good for you. we should be working on this around the clock

[annika💒 @simulacrababy]

boba shop next to the parking lot built over the bunker where hitler killed himself

[Isabel Steckel @IsabelSteckel]

pasta is so good it literally blows my mind. every time i eat it im like no fucking way

[tate @50FirstTates]

everyone always talks about the slight chance that ur hand could pass thru a table if all the atoms are in the right position. but no one ever talks about the higher chance that the atoms move half way thru and now guess what? tablehand

[lady of the swamp @j_weiland]

@heartluvr2000 It’s such horrible horrible news

[Rachel @femaleredhead]

time to pick out a bottle of wine based on my rigorous process (cutest label at the cheapest price)

[Keefler @Keefler_Elf]

this was in my drafts

[tay :D @redddhead01]

Bridget Mendler could’ve been Taylor Swift

[oat milk princess 🇵🇸 @heartluvr2000]

icelandair is the most whimsical airline by far… blows all the other girls out of the water. sitting listening to icelandic christmas music rn while they show me little facts about mythical icelandic winter creatures

[salem @vodkaoatmilk]

You should be allowed to smoke weed in TJ Maxx

[JAXIE @jaxajueny]

Me and my emotional support red head against the world fr

[E L H O T Z O @elhotzo]

hätte es irgendwie cool gefunden, wenn zwischen „die dünnste Decke ist noch zu warm“ und „sechzehn Decken übereinander sind noch nicht genug“ so ein paar Tage gewesen wären

[sloane (sîpihkopiyesîs) 🇵🇸🇨🇩🇸🇩 @cottoncandaddy]

trying to explain to my mom that me stealing 1 to 2 Littlest Pet Shop toys from my super rich friends undetected pretty much every time I hung out with them was a redistribution of wealth and in fact a moral thing to do

[E L H O T Z O @elhotzo]

Golf
- riesiger Rasen
- teurer Sport für reiche Arschlöcher
- lächerlich viele Schläger
- peinliche Outfits

Mini-Golf
+ kaum größer als ein Parkplatz
+ stabiler Nachmittag für stabile Atzen
+ genau ein Schläger
+ auch peinliche Outfits, aber freiwillig