Jac

[Jac @jacksmach]

@haleydinh I heard it’s wrapping around the street

[Jac @jacksmach]

Twisted my ankle wearing running shoes instead of court shoes, returns to pickleball on Monday.
Friend: and you wore them again ?! You fool!

[Jac @jacksmach]

Daniel: can we listen to something more uplifting ?
Me: this isn’t ?
Daniel: the song is called “daddy issues”

[Jac @jacksmach]

Friend to daughter: uncle Jimmy won again ? But why is uncle Jimmy crying.

Jimmy strained eyes from staring at the screen.

[Jac @jacksmach]

“She is chopped and looks tired all the time.”

[Jac @jacksmach]

Friend talking about his wife “she hates it when I say “sir yeth sir!”

[Jac @jacksmach]

You mean the 3 bears were eating oatmeal and not congee ?

[Jac @jacksmach]

At a baby shower playing guess the size of the baby bump.
Friend: what’s the typical size of a girls waist?
Me: like 26-29 inches ish .
Friend: ok I’ll triple that

💀he was in fact way off

[Jac @jacksmach]

Friend: maybe u can be the culture person at work
Christina: no I’m a follower

[Jac @jacksmach]

Friend visiting our new place: oh hell
No you got a river running through here

[Jac @jacksmach]

Friend: have u heard of Vietnamese coffee shops
Friend 2: like lees ?

[Jac @jacksmach]

Sam: you have to deal with that everyday at work trinh ? I’m just saving PdfS

[Jac @jacksmach]

Trinh: It’s not too bad , I only got punched once.

[Jac @jacksmach]

Black friend: I wanna be a black M&M
There is no black M&M
You can be brown

[Jac @jacksmach]

At pickleball: it’s so cold
Friend: that’s why I’m wearing layers
Looks over to see him wearing a mesh jersey tank over a t shirt

[Jac @jacksmach]

Alan: resistance training

[Jac @jacksmach]

Me: you know the singer *sings the song*
D: idk the song
Me starts singing the chorus
D: oh wait yeah I do, you are just off pitch

[Jac @jacksmach]

Stranger sees engagement photos on trees: are they missing ?

[Jac @jacksmach]

Friend: I heard he went to Yale…. What a nerd

[Jac @jacksmach]

Friend 1: do you think he’s bigger than you size wise?
Friend 2: I mean he’s fatter