J Darkside 🌗

🚲 New York Cycling Luminary 🏀Contender for 2020 Mister Basketball. @jacobdysart

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

Going to Peekskill to retrieve my runes

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

hello fellow kids

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

I want you to give me a sticker to place upon my bike

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

This fit + the bike costs like $14k

[Rachel Connolly @RachelConnoll14]

'I'm a London liberal and I hate you'

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

My berries! I must have dropped them out of the taxi window. My boss will be furious! Darkside, can you retrace my path to Columbus Circle and bring back 6 berries in 4 minutes?

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

Darkside, we have another mission for you. Brooklyn’s cattle pastures are a thing of the past, but some of their bovine denizens remain in the borough. Find and touch the four cows of Brooklyn before the day is over, and you’ll earn an upgrade for your steering system.

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

Real cycling doesn't have 100 green lights in a row. Not every red is jumpable. No ride is perfect, but every broadway bomb is a gift

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

I am a vietnam veteran of biking in New York City

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

The energy in here is amazing tonight. It’s unreal that this is just… back. Will you dance with me? I just did a 400-mile bike tour of the Adirondacks. I can show you the route.

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

Me: Is value money? Is money wealth? Is wealth capital?
Jackson: No

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

For years Jackson has cackled at me “You want a wife soooo badly don’t you?” You know what, Jackson? Now that you’re talking about it so damn much, that sounds nice actually

[jacob whitesides @JacobWhitesides]

goodmorning how are we feeling 😳

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

Bike Snob NYC becoming a reopen schools guy Is sad but makes perfect sense. Never has there been a more weirdly angry guy. Once he rode a righteous wave but now the squall has swallowed him

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

Jackson made fun of my inner world last night. And he gets impatient with me because I take too long to move in our chess games- no doubt to force blunders. And yet he watched into the spider-verse with me because he thought I’d like it. Life in its Beckett-esque absurdity...

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

@DJGiganticJ I have an active imagination. were you pretending to be a scrub?

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

Rode around with Jackson and Leo yesterday. Was I showing off too much? Probably shouldn’t ride for a month to be sure I’ve performed penance

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

The president paid less in taxes than what I spend on my bike in a month...

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

my helmet has like zero sex appeal

[The Professor @theprofessor]

Sorry to break it to some of y’all but when y’all check your watch/clock and the time is all the same number it has absolutely zero significant meaning lol. #SomeoneLiedToYou #DontGetMadAtMeJustHelpingYouWithTheTruth

[J Darkside 🌗 @jacob_darkside]

It’s traditionally 12 I think. Not important enough to post on my other account with 500 followers- no real career stuff happening on there, just chilling really. Just moved though. New place is great! Should I tweet about that?