Rook

...mileage may vary.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@OpenDoor96 @NotJosephhhhh @BarriosBra13763 @cody__cubs Six other leadoff hitters went 0/ tonight, like this somehow excludes what they do all season to justify leading off for their team—you look like an idiot. I’ve never seen someone jerk off so hard to one stat line. Get a life, you doughnut.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@Jomboy_ lots of fun to be had in the Cubs-Diamondbacks game. Merrill Kelly is putting his absolute all into an audition for the angel on Quintin Berry’s shoulder. I’m sure you’re gonna have a good time with this #breakdown.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@bloojax @NHLMedia @BlueJacketsNHL Right? Jesus, where everybody been. This has been one of the hottest teams in the League right now.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@NHLMedia @BlueJacketsNHL Jackets been on a run…thanks for your obligatory annual check-in on small-market team though.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@AdamFantilli what a smile.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

Could have been painted by Rembrandt…

@BlueJacketsNHL @Aportzline @F1RETHECANNON
@Bucigross @Steve_Dangle @spittinchiclets

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@Caliphatality @tim_c_23 @BlueJacketsNHL #letemplay

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@BlueJacketsNHL “tf outta my crease, you plug.”

[Columbus Blue Jackets @BlueJacketsNHL]

ope didn't see ya there!

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@BarstoolTate It was every damn play. They has Jackson Jr hooked every time.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

Found my halloween costume…thanks, Ben Johnson.

@ChicagoBears

#DaBears 
#chicago
#Bears
#beardown

[Rook @jacobeugene]

Cal Raleigh absolutely rakes but he definitely also looks like a sad Mr. Strickland. Like he just listened to that banger of a heartbreaker, I Made it Through the Rain.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

If just one bank promised and delivered on 24/7 live access to account activity it’d be over. They’d have all of the business. And they’re all capable. No more “business days”. The world works seven days a week.

#laborday

[Rook @jacobeugene]

115K people attend Lolla, each day, and you you allot an ADA seating area capacity of 50 people for the main stage. Dozens of people now lined up behind a giant platform, out of view of the stage, for one of most popular bands in the world. Real cool, @lollapalooza.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@BrennanLM over here about to have an aneurysm.

#restonyourlaurels

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@williammount @inthefade Season 3 coming soon, let’s gooooooo!

[Rook @jacobeugene]

Now you tell me, Twitter.

[Ajay Anand | Rare Carat @rarecarat]

3 Cheat codes to save on your engagement ring 💍

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@williammount @microwaveatl You have a podcast?

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@williammount So underrated.

[Rook @jacobeugene]

@JoeMaristela @michaelbeck @atrupar Houston got eliminated from playoff contention the other day. This game was effectively meaningless so having fun and doing something awesome with the fans, especially on a road game is the absolute best possible outcome of this scenario.