jakeallyn

MAN DISCOVERS BAG FULL OF STRANGE MEATS WHILE DIVING FOR TREASURES IN STORM DRAIN

[maxie (colonizer) 🥩 @maxies_back]

the art director on Obsession sharing her grief over the financial and labor state of the industry, pouring her heart out and all the top comments on her post are a bunch of nobodies with negative knowledge talking about “you knew the rate” like i hope you die actually

[Brandon Streussnig @BrndnStrssng]

I know enough about low budget filmmaking to know that these things are more nuanced than Twitter allows but why is the prevailing response to that IG post chastising her for fear that she’ll never work again and not chastising the conditions that lead to this being the reality

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

i’d been sick for a full month with the worst flu of my life and then immediately afterwards received the worst food poisoning of my life and now my throat is sore again. whatever this one is better kill me or at least put me in the hospital for the drama, attention, and pity

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

why da they call her lisa when she on my moan until i vinci

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

every time you order water in europe they act like they’ve never heard of it before

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

i am self aware to the point of agony

[predictable girl @lov3ony0u]

It could be worse. I could be 26.

[yoshimi battles video game addiction @nise_yoshimi]

two beers in you gotta ask yourself, is tonight going to be the night of the wolf or is tonight going to be the night of the hog

[two beers and a diet coke @marlboro_jesus_]

The most attractive woman in the gym just asked me for a spot while I was looking at this on my phone

[Twiggy ✶ @doemisu]

GOONING ON THE FIRST DATE?2$!2&/!2

[Branko Marcetic @BMarchetich]

Harris was the peak of her polling in the first weeks of replacing Biden, and the more people saw of her, the more those numbers dropped. Argument to be made she would have benefited from an even shorter campaign.

[Chase Petra 🍉 free Palestine @chasepetramusic]

banana

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

if the tsunami comes just know that i am a very very strong swimmer and if i end up dead it was something else

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

i keep trying to use bluesky but it feels like those brown and grey mcdonalds with the touchscreen kiosks

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

@chasepetramusic sometimes the capeslop hits. i knew they were cooking when it was revealed cornenswet fought for the red trunks on the suit because he argued it made superman look friendlier :)

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

the lap swim -> chorizo breakfast burrito combo has to unleash the same amount of dopamine as heroin

[Ignoramus @BandwidthDenier]

Getting dropped off by my parents to drink at a friend’s house at 25 years old

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

the cats infested my entire room with fleas. i have been drinking heavily all day under the sun. i am want to i need to kill myself

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

the trader joe’s is playing somebody’s watching me halloween season has begun

[jakeallyn @jakeallyn]

underrated aspect of what kills me about Realistic Depiction of a Panic Attack media is that i don’t want stories of people dealing with their problems in a healthy and normal way because that is inherently boring and sucks