Jake Simmons

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

@SamMedaglia Who are you

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

@Richie_Damiani Thats not my name so it's still plagiarism

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

@cvogelschmidt I think that shows just how conflicted people were this year over this god awful choice we had to make

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

@cvogelschmidt not disagreeing with you, but she won by little more than .001 percent

[A.C. Men's Rugby @AC_GatorRugby]

And congratulations to @JakeSkimmons for his entrance into the sacred halls of boot shooters

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

@EricTheOtter17 @doubleDs871 I'm honestly not sure, but I'm not the same person I was a year ago...

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

@cvogelschmidt I've never been able to find a more accurate description of what you remind me of hahaha

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

@_berger_70 you can't NOT return a bow Berger. It's a courtesy thing

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

An Asian kid just bowed to me

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

Me: "Berger are any of your hot cousins single?"
Berger: "Fuck man, I wish"
@_berger_70

[SportsCenter @SportsCenter]

Great day to be a Pittsburgh fan:
• Steelers top Cincinnati
• #24 Pitt defeats Notre Dame
• Penguins beat Canadiens

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

Happy birthday Jim @Jimboslice785

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

Seventeen thirty STRAIGHT @holly_mangan

[RiFF RAFF / DALE DAN TONY / JODY HiGHROLLER @JODYHiGHROLLER]

YOU HAVE NiCE KNEES

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

S/O to Kevin the server #bucabirthdaysong

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

@_berger_70 @KingJoeAnderson Berger just accept the loss

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

Khlem stories are some of the funniest shit you will ever hear #21andcounting

[Jake Simmons @JakeSkimmons]

If I was made of weed and I sold myself, would that be prostitution in addition to drug trafficking?