Jake Waters

Musician. Absurdist. Idiot.

I write quirky songs and play some instruments, primarily accordion and ukulele.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

I can tell the time of day thanks to @CenturyLink internet! Internet's down again. Must be a few minutes after 9:00! Expecting a few more drop outs by day's end, as per usual. Need a new provider asap.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

@gnysearat I've internetted since the dawn of internet time, though now days I mostly remain quiet. Instagram is my occasional outlet.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

Do you remember when you joined Twitter? I do! #MyTwitterAnniversary

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

@AskPlayStation Hey, thank for reply. I'm now following. Please let me know what I need to do in order to obtain a replacement for my PS VR cable 4.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

@AskPlayStation My Playstion VR cable (4) has developed an issue to where it occasionally works, and only when in certain positions. How can I go about getting a replacement cable 4?

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

@LDSchurch I'm curious to know the reasoning behind telling the demonstrators to not touch the building. Saw the video. Just thought it seemed tacky and petty.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

@AskZionsBank How long does it take to hear back on a Home Equity loc? Applied almost a week ago and no word. I'm up against a deadline.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

@jasoninthehouse You say some of the most ridiculous things.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

New kicks #chucktaylor #converse #allstar #walkinonthesun #smashmouth https://t.co/mVDcPOl3Eb

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

Did anybody think to tell strangers to not talk to kids? And can strangers talk to other strangers? #strangerdanger #besafeguys

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

I probably want to be the Baha Men when I grow up.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

In the 80s I never thought we'd one day live in a world without Bugle Boy clothing, yet here we are. Might as well be the apocalypse.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

You'll never guess where I'm celebrating my birthday! @ Chuck E. Cheese’s https://t.co/vvgK2UZUdr

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

Oh wow! My own totally not fake birthday star cake on my big day! Aw, I shouldn't have! https://t.co/dRi4Jr9CeA

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

I've always wanted to be part of a jury. Right now is NOT a good time for this though. Ugh. https://t.co/ad8jIR1r8t

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

Alf. ALF. You're 93 years old and you don't even know who Alf is? ...Piece of crap! -Tourettes Guy

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

Salt-N-Pepa were into some weird racial stuff wanting an Arnold body with a Denzel face.

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

I found it, guys! 20 FL OZ of transparent, liquidy nostalgia! https://t.co/CxEZMY6tRN

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

Most of Justice's songs don't do anything for me, but this track is pretty great.
https://t.co/CoidL4z9hp

[Jake Waters @jakewaters]

I'm here and it's not even my birthday!!! https://t.co/LSndhzooS5