James Iles

Dragged out of the beaches of West Wales & now living in Bath. Working for a small technology company in Bristol...

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

*@eltonofficial singing his new Christmas single*
“Remember when I thought Elton John was blind because I was thinking of Lionel Richie!? That was funny wasn’t it.”
“…”
“…”
“Katie…….”
“Oh what now!?”

@KatieVIles #shitmysistersays

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

“How do you spell Gorgeous? G-A-W-J…”
“Wait, the actual spelling of Gorgeous?”
“Yeh!”
“… G,O…“
“Huh?”
“..R-G..
“What!?…”
#shitmysistersays

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

“I need to go and check the Turkey”
“What for? Ebola?”
“What?”
That’s what you get from turkey right?”
“… No.”
#shitmysistersays @KatieVIles

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

@SFitzpatrick92 would you still pick 13 all blacks in a combined NZ Eng team 🤣

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

@capitalcom how do you set an alert on your desktop platform? Easy on mobile, not obvious on a browser… thanks!

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

“Y’know the #shitmysistersays about Eastern Europe?”
“Yeh?”
“I’ll be right soon wont I?”
“What that youll be Eastern European?”
“Yeh!”
“No.”

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

“She probably knows about Santa but maybe not the whole Joseph being crucified bit”
“…That was Jesus.”
“Oh…”
“And Easter.”
#shitmysistersays

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

@AdeleRoberts There are only 5 Pizza Express in Birmingham centre and there is only one near both a Costa and Subway - Oozels Square - next to the Sea Life centre and Birmingham Arena... #hideandseek

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

“Am I Eastern European?”
“… what?”
“Am I?”
“What are you doing?
“Filling out a form?”
“… you’re British.”
#shitmysistersays @KatieVIles

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

For 1 day only… #shitmysistersays - the visitor edition.

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

@bencavs 😂

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

*Leaked question from the 2018 GCSE Math paper* - James & Sarah have 1 house. James & Sarah have 2 doors on their house. James & Sarah have just had a quote for £11,000 to change those doors. What will the average temperature of the house be after deciding they don’t need doors?

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

@DWFitnessFirst how do I contact someone about a complaint?

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

*Hugh Grant looks towards Margaret Thatcher picture on the wall in Love Actually*
“… is that Theresa May?”
“…”
#shitmysistersays @KatieVIles

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

@CostaCoffee why have you halved the size of your Raspberry and Almond bakes? Religiously ate those things, not anymore! 😕

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

@BRillustrations aw man! That’s awesome.. what do I need to do? 😀👍🏽

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

@BRillustrations 😳 howwwww??

[James Iles @jamesadiles]

“Want me to take your case?”
“It’s okay.”
“Sure?”
“Yeh. It’s got four wheels so it’s like I’m walking a dog!”
#shitmysistersays @KatieVIles

[Affinity @Affinity]

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[James Iles @jamesadiles]

“There’s Duct tape Sar…”
“Oh!…”
“…what?”
“It isn’t spelt like a duck!?“
“……no.“
@sarahwills12 #shitsarahsays